Lone Star J.R.

Happy B Day Pops

2010-11-28T13:13:00.001-08:00

May they have carrot salad in Heaven. Have a great day, eon, or existence now that you are not of this world. Thinking of you today on this earthly realm. You are loved and dearly missed.

Happy Fathers Day

2010-06-19T20:50:00.000-07:00

Happy Fathers Day Pops... Love you and miss you.

Burial Details

2009-04-22T07:21:00.001-07:00

Pops burial of his ashes will be on Sunday, June 28th at 3 PM in Moorhead, Iowa. Not expecting anyone to come but immediate family, but all are welcome. The closest airport is Omaha, Nebraska if you fly in.

Summer Plans

2009-04-21T07:00:00.000-07:00

Haven't written in a long time. KA keeps telling me to get going on our family blog but I haven't had the sense of purpose to fire it up yet. Things with Mom are going OK. She is now settled in DeSoto, Texas and the phone number is 972 298 1873. She is getting going and still unpacking. Adele is still in the house and looking to move into another place- so they are roommates- Sweet!

Mom has plans this summer of going to a camp reunion in Bandera, Texas in June and then up to Iowa to a class reunion. Many years since high school for EE- I don't know how many, but a lot. Should be quite a party. Our family is going to meet her in Iowa and Adele will travel with her. She can't travel alone at this time. Our big plan is to bury Pops ashes at their gravesite. I wanted the whole family to be a part of it as a closure issue so we are going to make that part of our summer trip. Every year we head out for a 10 to 14 day excursion and go different see areas. We've done the North West, Texas/ Oklahoma and last year we did the New England thing. This year we are going to Iowa! Yippee! We actually will then hit the Dakotas and Yellowstone and then work our way down to Colorado and see a baseball game. We StubHub'ed some tickets for July 3rd. D Backs at Rockies. Then we'll head for home.

Things are going well. Zane and Noah are plating soccer. Zane is into it- Noah is not. I think he is done with the Euro Futbol. Zane has really improved with his soccer. Other parents are even telling me this at the games. He is getting big and fast. He is almost 5'9" and wearing a size 12 shoe. Wonder where he gets that from. Noah is also playing baseball and I coach his team. We are the Astros and were a good little team. We actually play tonight. It is a lot of fun to coach and watch the kids develop. Noah will pitch a little and then anchor the team as the catcher. He is hitting the ball well from the left side of the plate. I will update accordingly.

Ice Road Truckers

2009-04-02T13:17:00.000-07:00

Mom is now in Kansas City until Easter. My buddy Chuck and I drove her stuff that was here in Utah back to KC last week in a period of "bad timing." We drove up to I 70 and headed east. We hit terrible roads pretty much all the way. We went through Denver-airport closed, headed into KC- airport closed. We saw over 30 accidents and saw 6 happen in front of us. Truckers told us we were "crazy" to try to go over Vail pass until it cleared. That is why we are now Ice Road Truckers. Me from Houston and Chuck from LA- experienced winter drivers to say the least.

We made it back and Mom will now leave early next week and go to DeSoto, Texas (near Dallas). She seems to be adjusting well and I know she will be happy when she is settled. Her motto to me when I was there was "bloom where your planted." It will be a process but it is part of the life cycle- not to be dismissed. We all get it. I just read Tuesdays with Morrie and it is interesting how the dealing with death process is so familiar. I enjoyed the book and found it comforting. I am now starting the book about The Last Lecture at Carnegie Mellon. I can't remember the actual title but it seems good so far. Will keep you posted on new events in EE's life and will put my family blog on here someday- just kinda done with it for right now.

My Popsy Doodles-by KA

2009-03-29T15:56:00.000-07:00

I do not have the wit of this blogs author. However, he said I have an "in" with him and he allowed me to post. Ever since the Celebration I have had some things I have wanted to say. I don't know if I would have been able to talk that day because I was so emotional and Matt/I felt everyone who came needed the time more urgently than we did. I feel so blessed to have gotten to spend so much time with Pops in his last days. Many times I got to talk with him one on one about how much he meant to me. Now I feel the need to express some of my own grief publicly.

When Matt and I started dating in 1992 we knew pretty quickly that we were now involved in something more serious than our previous relationships. Thanksgiving that year, Matt took me to Dallas to meet his parents. I recall meeting John/Eileen and feeling quite comfortable with both of them. Two things I remember most were, Matt being so impressed with how John took to me, and John having this conversation with me about how I "must" be a runner. I guess he thought with my 95 lb. frame I would be fast and have an easy time running. Little did he know he was looking at his future daughter-in-law whom has never had an athletic bone in her body. That did this year influence my decision to train and run the St.George Marathon, however I was neither fast nor was it easy.

John and I had always been able to tease one another. There was an ease about being with him. Perhaps it was that we had our New England roots, or just that I usually was a daddy's girl and expected the same from him.
John , believe it or not, was not always the easiest person to be around. He definitely had his "moods". Matt was always impressed that I could call him on it and he usually would soften up. He and I also had some real disagreements- especially when he would get so down in his last months with the cancer. I would often hear him talking about wanting to die and would get upset with him stating that it was not yet "his time". One day he got so mad at me stating that 4 people-Matt, Eileen, the doctor and myself were making decisions for his medical care. Mostly this meant that he wanted to go on hospice and we did not feel it was time. He and I were hollering, crying, and before long we were hugging. I guess that my way of dealing with conflict influenced our interactions and more often than not we "grabbed the bull by the horns" and "got er done". I think he respected that about me and we always walked away shaking our heads but also knowing the other person cared.

John always got so mad at me for cooking too much. Anyone that knows me, knows I love to cook, especially for those I love. When John and Eileen would come for a visit I would do a whole spread, of course for breakfast, lunch and dinner. He would get upset that it was meal time already and say I made way too much food. However, he would eat nearly everything I put on his plate and of course had room for dessert too. John and Eileen's traditional eating schedule involved a big lunch meal and smaller dinner. We are more traditional with a big family dinner. I never could get the "big meal of the day" tradition down and overfed him with much chiding from him. I think he enjoyed every minute of it-teasing and the food too.
However, he let me be myself and loved me the way I am.

In his last few weeks, I loved the way he would hold onto the kids when they said goodbye, especially Tatum. I also enjoyed being the only adult that could fit on the bed with him. I would crawl up with him, give him sips of water, coffee, feed him ice cream and rub his head. He seldom flinched and just knew it was his crazy daughter-in-law trying to take care of him the best she could. One day just maybe 10 days before he passed he was not looking well, and all of a sudden he gave me the goofiest look right in my face. None of us that were there with him expected him to be joking around, but he still had a little of that John Humphrey in him I always felt so comfortable with, and we all laughed so hard.
I sure miss that! He will always be my second Pops! That cannot be replaced and will be sorely missed.

There are also the memories of his relationship with God. I will always treasure the family prayers. Of times "singing" grace and just hearing him sing. He had the best resonating bass voice.
I do want to say too that I have appreciated getting to know the Humphrey side of the family. I am now reading George, his Dad's autobiography. Uncle Lee, Uncle Eric, Laura, and the whole clan we love you and are so glad that all of this has brought us closer together. I am more proud than ever to call myself a "Humphrey". There are many aspects of this family that I now fully appreciate seeing John's roots, meeting the clan, etc. John was so proud last summer to send us back to Boston as his family's representative.

I also appreciate getting to know the Johnson/Jensen side of the family. Uncle Gordon, Aunt Maxine, Rodger, Lana and Lynette, thanks so much for coming to the Celebration. I too, am very impressed with this side of the family. I never considered I was a Johnson, but feel so loved and accepted by these folks that I can say I am also Johnson. Roots have always been important to me but now more than ever.

Another thing, I must say, is nowadays I look at Matt and see bits of John, mannerisms, attitudes and actions. I am glad to have a little of Pops here with us everyday. Matt and I both feel like being there with him in his last days was a blessing. I feel like it helped us finally "grow up". Do you believe his last night Matt and I actually slept together in a recliner by his bed?
More than all that I am so glad I know where he is now and that he is pain free, happy and without sadness. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that someday I will see him again. For this I am grateful to God for his gift of salvation through his son Jesus Christ.

Thanks for letting me share my thoughts today. It feels so good to walk down memory lane and remember who he was and try to imagine where he is today.

With much love and much to be grateful for!

Kerry Ann McFadden Humphrey

Info on EE

2009-03-21T15:08:00.000-07:00

Eileen is going to out of circuit for awhile. She turns off her computer tomorrow and is going to KC for about two weeks. Then she will go to Texas to get set up.

Her contact info for Mid April and beyond:

Eileen Humphrey
764 Village Green
DeSoto, TX 75115

(972) 298 1873

One Week Tomorrow

2009-03-19T16:59:00.000-07:00

PICS: Lone Star and EE in their heyday is the 3rd photo, Mom and Pops at their 50th wedding anniversary at Cooper Mountain Ranch (Bill and Cindy's) in west Texas, Pine Valley in Utah with the kids. I realize the two photos are crappy- I took them with my phone from a wall picture..real high tech.

There has been a lot of activity in the past week. Monday, Mom and I went by Metcalf Mortuary and made final arrangements for Pops. I lied previously when I said it was no big deal- that he was already gone and only a shell remained. We made arrangements and then they made him "presentable" to EE and myself. We went in and Mom was ready to leave within about ten seconds saying "I don't want to see him like this." I, on the other hand, was like a little boy and did not want to leave. I stroked his hair and talked to him. He looked so calm and small- almost like a doll. I especially did not like looking back at him as the door closed to the room. I even opened it one more time, in the knowing that this was the last time I would ever see his physical presence here on Earth.

Adele came in late Tuesday, and also on this day, Mom went with KA and the kids up to Pine Valley mountain. She has wanted to go ever since she first visited years ago. Snow prevented a full trip to the top but they had a great day. Note the pic with her. They had a good day and it was good for her to get out. I found the obituary of Lone Star on line in both the Independence, MO paper and also the one in Arlington, MA. Somewhat surreal.

Adele and Mom got pedicures on Wednesday and Mom got her hair done. Adele definitely helps keep Mom preoccupied and also had made her feel better by going to the storage area and getting some of the boxes that we tucked in there 16 months ago along with other items that would not fit in the downsize that happened twice while Mom and Pops were here.

Today Adele picked up the remains and the death certificates to start the changing of names on important documents as well as notification to Medicare, SSI, etc. I took the Boy Scout troop to BrianHead ski resort to do some snow tubing. It's great- since I can't do it because of the immobilizer boot. It was okay. I just need to watch myself because I find myself extra irritated over little things as of late. Part of the process I guess. Every kid loves a grumpy Scoutmaster! I could drone on about the seven stages of grief... but I won't. Plan is now to move Mom next week. Her and Adele are leaving next Wednesday and my buddy Brandon and I are following on Thursday with the big U Haul- 20 hours through the Rockies and into the midwest. My legs are stiff just thinking about it.

Tid Bits

2009-03-16T07:52:00.000-07:00

Going with Mom today to Metcalf Mortuary to make final plans for Lone Star. She wants to see him one more time. I guess I will too- but have no urge to since "he" is gone. Mom says she feels a little better but still is a fall risk when walking around. We are checking on her and took her out to brunch yesterday after church. She enjoyed getting out and it was a nice 60 degree sunny day with springtime trees in full bloom. I hated going to church- not for the fact of church, but for the fact of "i'm sorry...yadda yadda". I know it is normal and people do it because they care for you and your well being but it just brings it all up.

Something Pop said to me that I didn't ever put on here:
- "You need to grow a beard." Pops and I were talking one day while he was bedbound and I had just shaved him. He reached up and felt my chin as he asked me "Did you shave today?" I said no and he asked me if I was growing a beard. I told him "No- i've never grown a beard- or a goatee." He responded "You should grow a beard soon. Everyone has to grow one at some point in their life." I assume he meant just men, but i'm on day four of a goatee. Beards are just cheesy- unless your getting ready for a winter hunt or excursion. One mans opinion.

I am going to start a new blog on our family. I will still add to this Lone Star blog with pertinent info related to Mom and Pops as well as what happens with his remains. I will also put EE's new address on here when she gets settled. I have all these blog skills and it will be nice to do a lighter blog on our exploits. I'm not even sure what to call it yet. I'm leaning towards ZipNipTip and the Dust Wranglers- or Lumpy, Beauty and the Three Beasts- but we'll see. You will be able to link to it from here- but only of your interested. We are also going to get back on some priorities we had prior to taking on the cancer ordeal. We are going to get back to looking at adopting an adolescent girl from Africa- or somewhere in the proximity. We also are going to camp and get out more as a family group. Also, KA and I are going to take a long weekend and go to the Mandalay Bay in Vegas and lounge by the pool. We'll see. Thank you again to all for thoughts and prayers in this ordeal. please keep them coming for Mom/ EE as it will be hard in the next year as events and anniversaries and such come up. Thanks to all.

Obituary

2009-03-14T15:52:00.000-07:00

This is an obituary that was complied by John's brother Eric. Thanks Eric.

John Robert Humphrey, 76, died Friday March 13, 2009 in St George, Utah after a long battle with cancer. He was the beloved husband of E. Eileen (Johnson) Humphrey, and the son of Mildred Humphrey and the late George Humphrey of Arlington, Massachucetts. He was the brother of G. Lee Humphrey of Wayland, Massachucetts and Eric Humphrey of Bedford, Massachucetts.

He was born on November 28, 1932 and spent his formative years in Arlington, Massachucetts, graduating from Arlington High School in the class of 1950. He then attended Wentworth Institute, graduating in 1952, and served in the US Army in Germany from 1953 to 1955. He then enrolled at Boston University, earning a bachelor's degree in aeronautical engineering in 1959.

Mr. Humphrey began his professional career with Maxon Corporation of Muncie, Indiana, as a sales engineer. He became Maxon's Southern Regional Manager and was based in Houston, Texas, where he lived with his family for more than twenty years. He retired from Maxon Corporation in 1990, after a career of forty-one years.

Mr.Humphrey was very active in his church and contributed much time and resources to it, and also Outreach International organization. After he retired, he relocated to Hayden, Idaho, St George, Utah, and Independence, Missouri to promote the objectives of this organization. Among his many interests, he enjoyed the outdoors and participated in many competitive bicycling and marathon running events throughout the United States.

In addition to his wife of fifty-two years he is survived by one daughter, Adele Phelan of DeSoto, Texas, and four sons; Mark and his wife Sylvia of San Antonio, Texas, Todd and his wife Candice of Battleground, Washington, Paul and his wife Stefanie of Tulsa, Oklahoma, and Matthew and his wife KerryAnn of Hurricane, Utah. He also leaves twelve grandchildren, nine nieces and five nephews.

In lieu of a funeral, a gathering of family and friends to celebrate his life was held in Hurricane, Utah on February 14, 2009.

Snuck By The Night Watchman

2009-03-13T09:49:00.007-07:00

KA and I spent the night with Pops last night and he had a really peaceful night overall. His oxygen sats got as low as 33% but he showed no signs of distress. Twice he arched his back and took in a deep breath and I thought that his passing might be close at hand. Yet again, he found his rhythm and he got back to his normal breathing pattern- which was oxygen stats at roughly 50% and a pulse of 100 beats per minute.

Right after 8 AM Ethan showed up and we were talking about the night and how Pops was doing. We had talked about metabolic acidosis and how long a body can survive with oxygen saturations at 50% and did figure today would probably be the day. I told him I better go let my Mom know how he was doing and since Ethan was there now would be a good time. I walked across the breezway to her place and gave her the update. I then stated that I wanted to go back and be there while Ethan was there to see the plan. As I went out her door he came out of the BeeHive home and said "he just passed". Just like Lone Star, leave him for two minutes and he goes on- onward and upward.

Ethan said in all his years he has never seen anything like it. He just didn't take another breath- no struggle, no short gasps, and only one successful nerve response which is when the brain stem tries to restart the body. He said it was unique.

They just took him to the mortuary after Jim Hetrick, and Jerry and Jan Jamriska came by from their church and offered a group prayer. There are many thanks in the whole journey of Lone Star's ordeal and battle. I cannot write them all in because I know I will forget some. Special thanks to the folks at the BeeHive home for their loving care, at my work, Coral Desert, for allowing it to be an outlet for my parents and a place to socialize as well. Thanks to Hospice Alliance and all that they have done to ease the transition and alleviate pain. Thank you as well to Community of Christ church for being there for them, even though they could rarely attend. There are lots of friends and family to thank as well. We do appreciate and treasure all that came to the Celebration of Life. It was a joyous experience for all. Thanks to those that stopped by and checked on them- Cathy A, Chuck and Drema, Cindy and George, church folks- this meant a lot especially since they were out of their element and did not have a lot of social outlets because of Pops condition and also because they were so far removed from their home base of Missouri. There are others and i'm sorry if your not mentioned- but your not unappreciated.

I will update on a basis of information that has transpired in the coming days. Pops is to be cremated and his ashes put into six separate containers. EE is going to bury hers in Morehead, Iowa at the old Danish cemetery where they have gravesites. Her grandfather donated the land and hand built the churh amd pews- a true Johnson cemetery. The other 5 containers will go to the 5 children. I will update on where these have been spread. I know i'm gonna take him up mountains and also on a marathon. You don't want to be behind me as I get near the finish line or you just might get a bit of him if you inhale too deeply. I also want to make sure he gets in the Medina river by Bandera, Texas. If a sibling can't do this- then I will. I'll say it again. I loved my Dad.

R.I.P.

2009-03-13T07:40:00.000-07:00

Friday the 13th, at 8:20 AM John Robert Humphrey left this Earth to go on to bigger and better things. He went peacefully and without struggle this morning. I would ask you to watch his video as you think of him and I will give details later.

The "Celebration of Life Video" of John Robert Humphrey

2009-03-12T21:48:00.000-07:00

http://www.mtotf.com/humphrey/index.com

Enjoy this video of Pops. It was shown at the Celebration of Life.

Sitting In The Dark

2009-03-12T18:43:00.000-07:00

It was recommended by Ethan that we shut off the lights and leave him alone for awhile to see if he will "go". That might work, but seems retarded. If thats what it takes he will go tonight because i'm not planning on staying up partying in the room all night. Mom and KA and I enjoy being with him- even though it can be stressful at times. I do not think it will take that. In the last hour his oxygen saturation has gotten as low as 41%. It is steady as we speak at 46%. Lone Star, or Rasputin as might be his new name, is very peaceful and resting. His breathing has slowed back to where there are lulls in between. I hope that it will come to a peaceful end, as he did have two bouts today where he was in distress. My last question, a medical one, is how low can someone go on oxygen levels and remain alive? I'll hit Google later and find out sometime. As of now, I wanna go back and hang with Pops, in the dark with no lights on. We'll give that a try

Brief Update

2009-03-12T17:05:00.000-07:00

Today has been somewhat surreal. KA and I were talking about this earlier. You cannot plan anything when Pops is in the position he is in. She asked me what we wanted for dinner and i'm like "i don't know, that depends". You try to do everyday things, but they have to be put on hold to help him, and Mom. Concern is also for EE/ Mom. She is now weak and wobbly and says she feels faint. Concern is a UTI for her- but I also believe it is the stress that she is under in all this. KA is taking a sample by the Instacare to see if antibiotics are warranted for EE.I t's stressful for all- not just here but family around the country. I just want Pops in minimal pain and to go as easy as possible- but at no point to I want hospice, myself, or anyone play God and help him over the edge. It is coming and it is out of our hands. As we speak Lone Star has a pulse of 110 and an oxygen saturation of 57%. It was as low as 48% earlier and he was battling with his pulse rising to 125 at this time. His temp right now is 103.1 and has been as high as 104.1 with alternating medicines. We are working on trying to keep the saliva/ fluid build up at a minimal level in his mouth as he cannot swallow at all. He has opened his eyes twice today- in times of lowering oxygen levels and high pulse.

Picking Up The Pace

2009-03-12T06:05:00.000-07:00

Pops had a more peaceful night last night. The two previous nights he had struggled with coughing spells and I also believe with agitation due to urinary urgency. When the indwelling catheter was placed yesterday, that takes away that sense of having to "go" all the time. When Ethan put it in roughly 800 CC's came out of his bladder that he was holding. Flomax anyone? Last night I stayed with him all night. He did gurgle consistently but did not have the coughing battles that are so painful to watch. Maybe that is what the Atropine does, keeps it loose and moving, because he is still really gurgly overall.

When I say peaceful I do not mean improved. His oxygen saturation was 67-69% most of the night and his pulse was up between 120 to 150. His body is struggling, He is also now getting ibuprofen and acetaminophin every four hours on an alternating basis due to fever. This morning his temperature was 103.4. I am gonna take off work, again, because of how he is doing. It is hard for Mom to stay with him. She can't tolerate the gurgling and the struggle. On a better note, she feels a little better today. Good for her.

KA showed up and she is taking work off as well-at least the morning. We need to keep Mom company. Just checked Pops again and his oxygen saturation is at 55% and his pulse is 148. His body is fighting, but is shutting down. Still do not know if it will be today, we'll see.

Running A Nine Minute Mile

2009-03-11T17:28:00.000-07:00

Got two good things done today. Went and got the hair trimmed. I say trimmed because I am going to grow it out a little bit. Kinda like Noah's. Well, maybe that wouldn't go over to well for work, but a little longer overall. "The man" (old people patients) in work society do not like long haired therapists. I always have said to KA that if I won a lotto and was set I am letting the lettuce go. It could be a good retirement look as well. I also went to the gym and beat up on myself for an hour and a half. It felt great. The smell of the pool, the hum of the machines, running around in the locker room without a towel... never mind. I did enjoy it and it was a good release.

Went by and saw Mom and Pops after the gym. Update on Lone Star is that he has not woken up all day except when he is moved or repositioned. Then it is just a painful whince and a slant eyed look. He then fades away again. The Atropine does not seem to be doing much as he is still awfully gurgly even when it is administered every two hours and he is sat straight up in the bed. As stated this morning, it is the hardest thing to be around. You want to turn him upside down or get him a lung brush from the old SNL skits. He did seem peaceful this afternoon. Pulse sats were a consistent 73-74 and his pulse was 90. I told my Mom and my brothers that it was like he was running about a nine minute mile- quick short breaths with very infrequent deep ones. He is laboring at this point, but seems at ease unless moved. I refuse to say he is going out because his body is still fighting. I do believe he is ready, but his vitals are trying to stay, well, viable.

Talked with Pops recently about his passing when he was in a semi alert state. We talked again about how great it will be to see Uncle Bob, his son David, his nephew Lee, my Moms parents Art and Edith, and his dad, George. I had brought this up before, but two days ago he told me he had talked with his Dad twice. Whether medication or dying process prerequisites, he was emphatic that they had talked. I brought this up yesterday when I went by and told him it was okay to go see them. He was just sleeping and I was rubbing his head. I then told him I was leaving and got his room set up for me to leave. I turned around, at his partially open doorway with the lights dimmed, and he had crocodile tears coming out of both eyes. I went back in the room and asked him "Pops, are you okay?" to which he responded with closed eyes and a desperate look on his face "I love my Dad." I sat down again and said to him "What a coincidence, I love my Dad too." I sat with him another couple of minutes and he was faded away.

It is work at times to change your life and schedule to accomodate anothers needs. My wife can tell you I am a terrible communicator and like to do what serves me. I'm a PIA at times. Yet this is all worth it and I would gladly do it again for my Mom. It does help that I have a gal that is 50/50 in helping me in the whole process. Tried and true baby, tried and true.

Call The Lifeguard

2009-03-11T08:19:00.001-07:00

Went down at 2 AM last night because Pops was agitated and couldn't breathe. He is full of water in his upper respiratory system and he was struggling. He was in a semi coma state, but struggling, until about 7 AM. Atropine was given twice while I was there and did not seem to do much. Ethan, from hospice, came by around 8 AM and I talked with him. The atropine should work if given every two hours. He was not getting it every two- so I emphasized to him to communicate and make sure everyone knew this. I do not want him to struggle if it can be avoided. Ethan did say that all the patients he has seen at this point who can still verbalize state that it is not painful. It is painful to watch and hear, that's for sure. Ethan also placed an indwelling catheter and that should give Pops relief because his bladder will stay empty and he won't have that urgency, which has been bothering him.

Mom saw the doc yesterday and she has bronchitis. This morning she felt worse than ever, and also feels bad because of her not hardly feeling well enough to stay with Pops. Tough go for the two of them. Pops has not eaten in 3 days as far as I can tell and has had minimal water. Sips a time or two a day. He had none yesterday. This is "good" in the fact that if he keeps drinking he could linger for awhile in this shell of a state. I say "good" because this will end it quicker because he is not living- just wasting away in pain and with labored breathing. This is being controlled with meds but can still be tough at times to keep it under control. Wish I had better news to report.

I do want to put his Life Timeline video on the blog but it is too big. It is 15 minutes. I tried the blog and also youtube but I guess it needs to be in 2 parts. I'll work on it. I've learned a lot of computer tech stuff by doing this thing.

Time For Atropine

2009-03-10T12:00:00.000-07:00

I had a plan last night of going down and spending the night with Pops. KA was there kinda late and he was so zonked and out of it that there didn't seem to be any point. My jest of doing this was so that my Mom could rest and not worry about what was going on with him, as she is still battling a viral illness that has given her a sore throat and dry cough. Ended up going down to be with him about 3:30 AM after KA called and the gal working said he was "restless". Came in and he was responsive with eyes half open, and he muttered "Matt" after I greeted him. He was having a tough time and has a nice wet, gurgled sound from his lungs, or a death rattle, as it is commonly known. I sat him up and repositioned him but it did not help much. Today the emphasis is to start him on Atropine drops to dry up the fluids that are accumulating in the lungs from lack of activity. He is going downhill. Yesterday he ate nothing and asked for nothing. He did ask for coffee at one point and KA went and made a small cup. When she came back and offered it to him he said "no". He did have two sips of water. The one I gave him he choked on and it was not fun to watch. His oxygen sats last night were mid 80's to mid 70's and he had about a twenty second lapse between breaths at some points and then he would "catch up' with a few shallow quick breaths. I did ask him last night if he was afraid to die and he responded right away with a nod of no. Talked with Mom a bit ago and after being restless from 3 AM to 7 AM he has been snoozing and looks quite comfortable.

And The Band Played On

2009-03-09T09:40:00.000-07:00

Spent an hour at Pops this morning getting him situated. He was in a lot of pain and needed to be cleaned up. They do a good job with him, but they are not fully equipped to handle an involved hospice patient. Stephanie, the head supervisor, and others are all willing to pick up techniques to assist him- so when myself or KA go by we do a lot of ancillary things to assist with his medical needs. It's fine, and he appreciates it. This morning his bed was wet and he needed to have a new shirt and stuff put on. I had one of the gals help me and we flipped him around as gently as we could. He would moan and groan but at one point, he looked at the gal, Maria, and said "that's my son". I do like those moments of clarity. He sacked out once we were done and had repositioned him and apparently, he slept most of the night. I still want to get him out of bed at some point, if he wants to. He wasn't alert enough yesterday.

Anytime I think he is on his last leg, he rallies. His oxygen saturations ranged from 74 all the way up to 90 while checking him this morning. The dying process is quite different in monitoring it when it is someone you are close to. Mom, KA and I have talked about how it changes our daily routines. I, for one, am tired of eating out and not going to the gym. I like to get by the gym at least five times a week and haven't made it all week. I know, boo hoo for me-no gym and also have to wear the immobilizer boot. The kids also have to deal with changes and have grown accustomed to spending time at Mom's place watching TV and playing on the internet. KA and I have talked and life does need to continue on- as best we can. I'll miss him when he's gone and also miss my Mom when she moves back to Texas- but I think we will be shocked at the free time that we have rediscovered. I'm looking forward to baseball practice tonight as it is a routine of normalcy, yet I do feel honored to be available to help Pops on his end of life journey, however long that will be.

A Double A## Kicking

2009-03-08T11:06:00.000-07:00

I told you how Zane's soccer team got beat against a "really good team". Well, Noah's team played another "really good team. I'll say it- a pair of 7-0 thrashings sent them both packing. It was not what we had in mind for a break from what has been going on with Pops. Oh well... We did get out and went by a friends last night for ribs and goodies. Thanks Lyle and Wendy for a fun night of Butthead, ConeHead and Guitar Hero. Free Bird will never be the same again. Oh, and I dig the chick rock. I need to download the video of KA and Wendy bouncing up and down to Sabotage from the Beastie Boys. If only we had some pocket wieners the night would have been complete. Ahhh...pocket wieners.

Pops was up a lot last night in a state of agitation and confusion. He was talking about the "fires and the fire trucks". It took a few hours to get him calmed down. It is about noon on Sunday and he is alert and talking. KA did some oral care with him and he had a sip of water. They are having a church service at the BeeHive home and he could hear the organ. He said "it must be 11 o'clock".- so he is pretty "with it" as we speak. We did say a group prayer with him. Me, Pops, Mom and KA all chiming in. It was nice and I believe gave him some comfort even though we could not understand much of what he said.

I need the lock combo. Pops has a Master lock on his toolbox that he has had since I can remember. I know he had it when I was a small child because I remember it. It was put in place because he was tired of my older siblings getting into his tools and leaving them strewn around. Sounds familiar now that I think about it. He had never divulged the lock combo until he got sick. He told me about 6 months ago and I made a big deal about it. I would come up to him and just repeat the combo and he would get an irritated look on his face and say "Now Matt, don't go telling everyone that". Trouble is, I never used it except to get in his toolbox at that time and I can't remember it. I was in his room a few minutes ago and I asked him what it was... and he just smiled. He wouldn't say anything. I'm gonna get it from him- in a moment of clarity. He did start saying he would tell me, but all he said was letters, and it's numbers. I'll know it when he says it right. We are going to try and get him up this afternoon for awhile and I am gonna put the lock in his hand. If that doesn't work i'll bring out the big guns- which is popping the little pinky toe on the foot. Ask my wife and kids, i'll tell you i'm gonna do it and you still can't stop it.

Ob La Di, Ob La Dah

2009-03-07T13:25:00.000-08:00

Life goes on here as we watch and wait for Pops final time with us here. We have two soccer games today and also some errands to run. Zane played on a team this morning and they got beat- but he played really well. I won't say the score- i'll just say the other team was really good, really really good. Noah plays at 3:30 and we hope for a better outcome.

Adele left today to go back to Big D and stated she will be back shortly. This leaves Mom alone for more time and I discussed it with her. She said that she expects some lonely times and is bracing herself for it. She also knows that when she moves to DeSoto, to be by Adele, that there will be some alone times and adjustments. I told her to just hit the dating scene hard to fill the voids. I am glad to talk about these things with her and just come to understand her expectations for the next phase of her life.

My family is here at the BeeHive home as we speak. We come by and hang with Mom and Pops and just spend time. I think it is as helpful to EE as it is to Pops. He has been really out of it today. He has moments where he chimes in with a comment or responds to a question when coaxed, but has been really quiet and keeping his eyes closed. KA and I gave him a mini sponge bath and a shave. His hands are starting to smell a bit because he keeps them clenched most of the time. KerryAnn called this "stroke hand".- where people get sweaty and macerated skin from not being able to open their hand. I would not say it was that bad, but they did have a little smell to them. His oxygen saturation is reading mid 80's when he breathes deeply and down to mid 70's when he does not. He has longer periods of apnea between breaths- sometimes as long as 20 seconds. It is a typical Cheyne-Stokes pattern but he could go on for days like this, but I hope not- because this isn't living. He was scowling earlier and we got out of him that he was in pain and thats the last thing we want. It's in the hands of the Big Guy. I will keep you all posted.

Hangin'

2009-03-06T20:10:00.000-08:00

Pops is hanging on and actually had some alert moments today. He still does not want to be moved, or repositioned, as this causes pain, but he had some alert moments. I went by in the AM and he was pretty groggy. Adele stayed there as I went to work. You can't put life on hold forever to accomodate a death experience, but I do want him to know that I am at a beckoned call whenever.I have cancelled a lot of stuff the last few days- and now it seems he might be here another week- or maybe go tomorrow. His O2 saturation is about 83 percent. ( Normal is between 90-99). When you are low it means you are not having a good oxygen level in your blood- or your not breathing well.

Plan is to love Pops and accomodate his needs as we can. There are lots of "what do you need?" and such forth. He was alert tonight but in a lot of pain. He got upset when they brought in the medication of methadone to take but he calmed down when I explained why he should take it. He also said he was thirsty and he had some water. He could not pull it up the straw but I put the straw in the water and held the end- that left some water in the straw. This is a Mark Corry technique (owner of the BeeHive Homes) called priming the pump. We primed it, but he still could not do it.

I do not mean to string folks along with blogs- but he could go tonight, or be here for a short while. I do not have the plan from the big man and Pops goes back and forth from levels of effort. I will say this, he is a trooper and is steadfast in his relationship with God. He says he is ready and this is a tribute to his belief and committment to a higher power. You go Lone Star.... I asked Pops in a moment of clarity today who he wanted to see when he went to Heavenz: He responded that he wanted to see his father, George, and also his nephew Eric, Jr. He then said he was realy looking forward to seeing his boy, David, who was lost before my brother Paul. He also said he looked forward to seeing his Uncle Bob- who is just a name to me. Apparentle, he died at about age 60 and was his Dad's brother. This was new to me.

I am complimented with the hits on this site. In the last 2 days there have been over 30 hits from Sydney, Austraila to Singapore- as well as all over the US. Thank you for your caring and please support EE as she moves on from this transition of life. I acn only imagine the loss of someone who has been your key component for over 50 years. My kids still come daily and hug and talk to Pops. I have told them (especially Tatum) if at any point they feel uncomfortable to let me know- and they can say "no". Pops does enjoy them and told Zane yesterday "Your voice is changing"- Dude turned 13 in December and he is now 5'8". KA said "Pops, any words of wisdom for him?" to which Pop could only reply "Keep your.."- on numerous attempts at a further exchanges.
Continued antics will be reported and continued prayers for Mom and Pops will be appreciated. Mom is wiped out "holding vigil" and she is not in the shape to miss rest and burning the candle. we are forcing her to take naps when we are there and get her rest...

Rounding Third And Headed For Home

2009-03-05T18:39:00.000-08:00

It is 7:40 PM and I just got back to the BeeHive home and went in to see Pops. I just had my first baseball practice with Noah and so the title sounded appropriate. KA, Zane, Noah, Tatum, Adele and EE are here hanging out with him. He is in tough shape and responds only when aroused or when he is repositioned in bed. In fact, any passive movement makes him cringe and have a pained look on his face. He did not get out of bed today and again had a very few bites of oatmeal and coughed when an attempt was made to give him water. I cleaned his mouth out this morning with a warm washcloth and the CNA from Hospice Alliance- the hospice agency- gave him a bed bath. He is not moving his extremities and stays in a state of semi conciousness unless really aroused.

Came by earlier today and sat and talked with him and rubbed his head. Our big joke is that my Mom wants his hair parted to the side and I always rub it straight back....slick baby. Actually, it looks a lot like his Dad George wore his hair in pictures I have seen. When I was talking to him I told him "Pops, i'm sorry you have to go through this." He actually responded and said "we go through what we go through- and we all go through something."

Adele said something rather profound to KerryAnn while here before at the Celebration of Life party. She said "Maybe he is still here now for us, and not him". It made me think that I know I have a greater appreciation for my family and all the little blessings that are taken for granted, a larger empathy for family members of patients that I work with, and what they are going through. I also have more compassion for patients when they complain of pain- not a lot more, but some. Your not allowed to have a lot of compassion for patients that you deal with in rehab in regards to pain. The motto at Coral Desert in NO WHINERS!(That is a joke). Will update accordingly...

Fist Bumping Fun with Pops and EE

2009-03-05T12:03:00.000-08:00

This was a little video that I have on my phone. I need to download some other photos from my phone as well. This was January 26th.

A More Restful Night

2009-03-05T09:48:00.000-08:00

Pops had a better night last night- mainly due to the fact that that he has started back on his pain medications. As stated previously, his agitation is related to pain, and now with methadone three times daily he is more at rest. He also has roxynol(morphine) for breakthrough pain. He is not really eating or drinking much- but it is being offered on regular intervals. It is being offered, not pushed. Yesterday he ate a partial bowl of oatmeal and some bites of ice cream. He also had a little coffee and water. But not a whole lot.

Adele is here to stay for a few days and she can help out by keeping Mom company. She even got indoctrinated to a bed change and the use of non latex gloves. Pops is very sleepy and groggy but has his moments where he comes in and out. Not much else to report as of the visit to see him this morning.

Fight The Good Fight

2009-03-04T11:50:00.000-08:00

Pops had a later day and night of agitation. He did not sleep hardly at all and was wanting to get up and go the bathroom, or finish the movie, or find some coffee. He had some medication, but only a small amount. I stayed with him and I got him out of bed 5 times between midnight and 7 AM. He was a pistol. KA stayed with him the night before and he did not have a good night either- as stated before. He ran a temperature all night long as well. Today his oxygen level is a little low but the temp is gone. He is fighting the good fight to stay with us. Ethan came by and said two things. One, if he is up and agitated at night it means he is in pain. His mind/ attitude just won't admit it and two, if he's up all night- call hospice and let them deal with it. I didn't mind for the most part, we talked a lot and I have a reminder of it this morning, a tight lower back.

We'll keep you posted of changes.

Yo Yo

2009-03-03T11:33:00.000-08:00

Pops had a tough night last night. He had his oxygen saturations drop down into the 80's and also was having difficulty breathing. This is the first time his baseline numbers were out of whack in terms of heart rate / blood pressure, O2 sat level, etc... He was almost gone last night and the hospice nurse, Ethan, came by at midnight and said "he could go anytime."

Yo Yo man this morning: Came in and his eyes were open and he was alert for over an hour. He was more with it than he has been for the past three days. He does crash quickly and needs lots of sleep and recovery time, but he ate some Cream of Wheat and of course, more ice cream. As we speak, he is up at the dining room table with a fresh shave and hair done. KA is helping him eat lunch and I am betting he will be out for quite awhile when I put him back to bed. I went in to work today but can't do anything except wander around and ponder what he is doing. So I was told to go- because I was useless there anyway. I'm also taking off tomorrow with the thought being that he would pass on one of these days. Knowing him, he'll pull the rally monkey out and mess up scheduled plans- or at least I hope he does.

John Robert Humphrey

2009-03-02T18:53:00.000-08:00

Went by at 11:45 to see Pops. Talked with KA (she had the day off and spent most of it there with EE) and she said Pops was asking for me. I went by and he perked up. Mom says he perks up more for me- why I don't know. It's like he likes me or something. Prior to my arrival, he was talking in speech that no one could understand. I sat him up in bed and he had a good 45 minutes of interaction before he faded out. At this time, I fed him some ice cream. This was good because he did not have any breakfast and really can't swallow solid foods anymore. We tried some water but he choked on it. He needs thickened, pureed foods now- at least today. KA showed up, and finished feeding him the ice cream because I had to go back to work. She is great because she is small enough to tuck into the hospital bed with him between him and the wall. He likes it too, he smiled as she tucked in and gave him a kiss and a "Hello Pops!"

Went by again after work and we got him aroused again. He had slept since the last visit. Cindy (KA's Mom) came by and with Cindy, KA, Zane, Tatum and me we filled the room. He was asking for a Root Beer and so I called KA and she picked one up on her way from getting Zane and Tatum. He couldn't drink it and choked on small sips through a straw. He did have some more ice cream that KA fed him from her tucked in spot, next to him on the bed again.

He is a mess and is close to moving from our existence here. It should be this week sometime. It is sad to say this, but then again, he is not living his life. He is a shell of himself. I was glad to spend time with him today and rubbed his head and held his hand while telling him what a great guy he was. I tried to bring up old stories of nostalgia. He doesn't know if it is day or night and asked the time. I said "Pops, it's 4:45 in the afternoon. It would be time for you to start getting ready to close up the office on Ella Blvd and head home. Then put on your smelly running shorts and your New Balance and get ready to tackle Ponderosa for a big run. He nodded with a understanding from the past.

Last report, he is sleeping again. He was up for about 3 hours today in a concious state- or semiconcious depending on your cognitive scale. The rest of the time is sleeping. Ironically, he says he is in no pain even though he hasn't had pain meds since this morning. This is a blessing. He is in tough shape- he can hardly move his arms and cannot move his legs. He can barely hold his head off the pillow. I know that writing this is somewaht dramatic in the speed of which it is happening. I believe God will pull his card soon, and he will go home to a glorious existence without pain and with loving family. I told him today to look forward to seeing his father, George, and his nephew, Eric, Jr- as well as many others. There has been tears today overall from both those watching over him here and also from Pops. Still enjoying those moments of clarity from him where he can express himself. Will update tomorrow. Prayers for his peace appreciated.

A Sunday Afternoon at the Beehive Home, Followed with a Morning Temp

2009-03-02T09:36:00.000-08:00

Went by after work yesterday and spent about 4 hours with Pops and EE. KA and the kids came by from church and we had a good day. I got there and got Pops up,and then fed him lunch. Yummy. We then went and sat out in the sun until he got too hot. The party moved to the shade and we opened up their patio umbrella and camped out under it. It got up to 83 yesterday- (sorry Easterners, enjoy your snow.)

Pops had a good day although he was out of it. He did state he was "uneasy" about his whole ordeal. My Mom, KA and I all explained to him how it was alright to go. We told him we would miss him, and care for him while he was here.. but it was alright. He seemed at peace with this for awhile and then would bring it up again by saying "are you sure your Mom's okay with this?"- and we would then reassure him again. He did seem to enjoy sitting in the shade and listening as KA painted nails for EE, Tatum and herself. I'm glad he had a good day.

Today Pops could not take his pills or swallow anything. He also is running a temp of over 102 degrees. Hospice is getting liquid meds that can be put under the tongue because he is in pain from not having pain pills, This will be remedied within the hour but does not bode well for time here with us. It is all happening so fast. I, again, am glad we did the Celebration when we did it. I will update you with new facts as they happen.

D.Q. and Quail Lake

2009-03-01T10:00:00.000-08:00

Went and saw Mom and Pops yesterday and took them out on our ice cream date- as promised the day before. Pops had a tough day overall and was in and out of it for the most part. KA went earlier in the day and spent some time with them. Her yoga got cancelled so she went by and visited, and then ate lunch at the BeeHive home. She said he was fairly clear, and then about 12:30, got really confused. He hadn't had and medication since 6 AM so this was interesting.

We pushed the ice cream date to 3:30, from the scheduled 1:30. This worked out great because I got 5 hours of yard work in. Nothing like spring prepping your yard when it's over an acre large in the front. To quote John Lennon today: "I've got blisters on my fingers!". Anyway, went and woke him up at 3:30- which is a process. We finally got out to my car about 4:00 and it took all I had to get him in. He could not help at all. I have a 2006 Toyota Highlander and I thought we were not gonna make it for a minute- hard to move 230 pounds of dead weight. We did make it and drove into Hurricane and went through the drive thru at Dairy Queen. The whole time since getting Pops up he had been confused and speaking a rather unintelligible garb. He couldn't tell me what he wanted and once we ordered he couldn't hold it or feed himself. Funny deal: He had a vanilla shake the other night--- so at the drive thru I ordered Mom a small strawberry shake at her request, Pops a small vanilla shake , as the order from before, and me a small Snickers Blizzard. When he heard me order mine he said "oh yeah..." and turned towards me and grabbed my arm- so I changed his order to a small Snickers Blizzard as well. We went on a drive and were watching cyclists do a road race and tooling around. He didn't seem overly excited or bummed out by watching them. This was interesting to me because he was huge into road racing as a retirement hobby. I also was spoon feeding Pops when we were driving straight, or at a light- yet this wasn't really safe. We then went to Quail Lake and sat at the overlook. He did say that it was a beautiful spot. Mom said she thought it would be a good place for high schoolers to come and park.......EXCUSE ME??? Gross Mom!!!! Pops did not really want any ice cream at this time.

Pops was doing some interesting things as we drove. He kept reaching upward to things that were not there. He also tried reaching through the front of the windshield- as if up to the sun. Three times during our 2 hour "date" he asked if Millie was there. He always called his Mom "Millie", as her name is Mildred. I told him "she's in Boston, Pops"- as she is- still plugging along at 104 years of age. I've seen these behaviors in the past. I am not a prognosticator, but these are things that people do in preparation to dying. The way he has been the last few days makes me think that time spent with him now should be precious, for it is fleeting at best. I am going by there after I write this. It will be an everyday deal. I'm like a bad penny- I just keep showing up.

Another thing I like about going by is that he has been perseverating on people wanting to hurt him. He gets scared at times and says things like "they're gonna nail me to the cross" or "they're gonna come up through the floorboards and get me". My Mom and KA reassure him that he is in good, loving hands and that we would not let anyone hurt him. I say Mom and KA, because he doesn't say these things when I'm there. He told KA that he feels safe with me and he knows I would not let anyone hurt him. This is another reason I want to be around him as much as possible during his "awake" hours. I also like to catch and enjoy those glimmers of John Humphrey/ Lone Star JR/ Dad that make their way out of the shell of a man that is left.

Questions on Pops

2009-02-27T20:02:00.000-08:00

If you have any questions that need to be answered on how Lone Star is doing day to day that the blog does not suffice- please call me @ 435 229 4259. I will update you as best I can or return your call if I don't answer. Mom/ EE is busy most of the time at his place dealing with his needs and offering companionship- as stated earlier.
He had another bad day today and is 24 hour care at this time. We started some new interventions medically to help both him and the CNA's and we will see how they go. Plan tomorrow is that I am going to go pick up him and EE @ 1:30 and drive them around to get them out. We are going through the DQ drive-thru for some cream and gonna explore the area a bit. He loves the DQ ice cream and enjoyed a vanilla milk shake that was brought by the other day by George and Cindy. Thanks guys- and Happy B Day George.

Lone Star Update

2009-02-26T19:10:00.000-08:00

Pops has not been doing well the last week. In fact, ha has taken quite a turn for the worse- both physically and mentally. He is no longer able to stand with his walker. He couldn't walk at the Celebration, but he could stand and transfer mostly on his own. He is now totally dependent with mobility. I helped him to the bathroom and it was all I could do to get him on and off. I am 6'4" and 240 and work at a rehab center, where I transfer people throughout the day. As stated, it was all I could do with using body mechanics, positioning and blocking his knees. So, the girls at the assisted living center cannot do it- at least safely for both them and Lone Star. My buddy Brandon and I went and took out the armoire and TV that was moved in about a month ago. This is because they need to move the hospital bed to the middle of the room so the girls can get on both sides to help position him. So physically, he is dependent on others for dressing, toileting, bathing, etc... Sorry to paint a negative picture- but this is the fact.
Mentally he has declined as well. I won't go into a lot of details but he has really declined. He is needy for EE- but also is mean to her at times. As she says, "he wants me there, but then he tells me to "get out of here"". I do believe it is the hardest part for her. I know it is for me. Two days ago, he didn't know who I was for awhile while I was there. He is on heavy medications but also has a mental decline as well. Case in point, the "red shoes" talked about in a previous blog.
Bottom line is that he has really deteriorated in the last week. I do believe he was really trying to keep it together for the Celebration of Life , and he did. He peaked for about 5 days and now has gone farther down the slippery slope of lost independence.
Mom/ EE is spending the majority of her time over at the assisted living center and so she cannot be reached on her phone. The cordless won't get a signal or whatever. Do leave her a message as she checks them throughout the day. Also, the number for the Beehive Home is 435 634 7305 Ext 5. If you call it they will give her the phone over there. Do keep them both in your prayers, as I know you have...

My Two Cents From The Celebration

2009-02-25T21:23:00.000-08:00

I had sentiments to share at the Celebration of Life that I never had a chance to say. It went 2 hours and being the facilitator that was long enough. Whether I got them out or not was not a big deal except for the fact that Pops asked to hear them the other day. I told him these things while he sat at his house...

Baptism: I was eight years old when I was baptized by my father at the Medina River in Bandera, Texas. He came up to me from the middle of the river, as he had baptized someone else prior to me, and held out his hand for me. He nodded at me and said " You will never forget this the rest of your life." So far he is right. The lighting in the old photos is majestic- or God given to this day.

West Texas: He took me out of school and took me on a trip to West Texas. We went to Lubbock and San Angelo and we went to a crematory in the area. I got to look through a thick, small window and watch a body get cremated. A cool deal, if your Dad is a big wig in combustion equipment. MAXON burners did the job.... We drove to other places, and made calls, and what I remember is that Pops let me sit on his lap and "drive" the steering wheel while he worked the pedals on the Buick down below. Long, straight roads out in west Texas. Also, we went and saw "The Champ" (1979). This is the only movie I ever saw with him- just me and my Dad.

Woodlands Marathon: As a small child I remember going to the Woodlands- which was a new place at the time. I remember Pops running the race on more than one occasion. I also remember tracking up the finish line and getting roughly a half mile to a mile up the finish---- backtracking and looking for Pops. It meant so much to me to find him and run in with him. I watched others struggling around him. Biggest deal was that I knew how much training he had put into it. As a kid, we hung out and did so much in our cul-de-sac. Every 45 minutes or so he would plod along and fulfill his 5 mile track. He would come by the front of the cul-de-sac every 45 minutes or so. I thought, "no way"- and now I yearn for it after running 4 myself, it's a total soul completion deal- and a vindication for Pops. I enjoy having my kids run in with me- I do not know if it means as much to them, but I always thought it was a unique thing to experience.

Dealing With Pops

2009-02-25T21:04:00.000-08:00

Wow.... There has been a lot of changes in the last while. Pops is now non ambulatory and needs two gals to move him for the most part. I can still lug him around but he is a safety risk for most deals. I love him so much, but he has no idea of what is going on most of the time ---- his deal is just "is Eileen with me?- or not". It is very sad to go by for 30 minutes and hang out because almost every time there is a downgrade overall.

He was great with Tatum today. She was filling the bird feeder for my Mom, while I was trimming his toenails and shaving his grill. Hospice was to do it, but did not. We had a good time going out into the sun again today. I went by and have been trying to get him outside into the environment as much as possible. It's been 70 degrees and sunny. Problem is, he doesn't know what's going on for the most part. He is very confused and they have been holding his sleeping pill. It is a sad deal overall as he is very non functional.

Good Weekend-Tough Week

2009-02-23T08:37:00.000-08:00

Had a pretty good weekend overall. Had baseball tryouts- which I coach Noah- so I had to scout out the boys. We also did our draft that night. I dig stuff like that, it was enjoyable. I tried to trade Noah for a kid with less hair and more power but had no takers. (That was a joke). Worked yesterday and had some good results with a stroke patient and that was rewarding. Texas beat OU in basketball- always gratifying to beat OU- even if their best player got hurt. Rockets won.... OK enough good stuff.
There has been some let down after all the commotion of the Celebration of Life party. The party was great and well worth it, but it took it out of both Lone Star and EE. Mom went to the Instacare and has a UTI, and also was "close to pneumonia"- as stated by the instacare Doc. She still sounds terrible but is feeling a little better. Thank you Alexander Fleming for discovering penicillin.
Pops has had some rough days and has been a bit angry and combative. He gets upset and does not follow directions that are in place to help him and improve his safety. He will not use the call light, he sneaks over to the Cottage when no one is there, and he has been quite cranky overall. He also is getting more confused and is hallucinating at times. He confabulates stories and gets upset when attempts are made to redirect him. I have told my Mom not to always try and redirect him because it just gets them both upset. She likes to very grounded and literal and he can't be at this point. When the family was visiting at the Cottage he kept asking for his "red shoes- the ones you polish". Mom kept saying "John, you do not have any red shoes- you never have". I finally told her to just let it go. There have been many stories like this. Ethan, the hospice nurse, says it this way. The cancer is taking all the nutrients from his body for itself. This leaves minimal nutrients to help with brain activity and function. We will see how things go in the next few days- hopefully he will have some rebound functionally. Wish I could write better news, but this is it at this time.

Celebration Photos and Zion Hike

2009-02-20T07:08:00.002-08:00

Photo Bucket and Slide

2009-02-17T17:08:00.001-08:00

I swear this blog is making me an up to date computer guy. My typing still sucks but I now move around on the blog without trouble. I joined Photo Bucket tonight to do a slideshow of about 10 Celebration pics. It even linked me to facebook in the recent past, and now i'm "friendly". I must admit I am a bit addicted to facebook- you catch up and see what's going on with a lot of people. I'm more social now than I was in high school, or college.

Other things that went on with the relatives visiting for the celebration were, for one, we went to Zion National Park. The active crew did the Angels Landing hike- about 2 hours up and 1 hour down. They had a good time. Kudos to Uncle Gordon for being the only one to make it all the way to the top. Icy slants and 900 foot dropoffs didn't slow him down- so I was told. I say "they" because I got to hang with the "less active" (older)people and the little kids. I have a torn plantar fascia in my left foot and have a sweet walking boot. So much for cross training. I was doing a deal at the gym where I would jump up and grab the basketball rim and do a pull up. Run to the next one and do it again. I had a nice "POP" in my foot about 2 and a half months ago with pain. It will not heal without immobilization. I'm not a patient person, and i'm a terrible patient and noncompliant. But I do wanna get better so i can get active again. I blame the P 90 X infomercial and it's insistence on "cross training and challenging your body". My goal has been to be in the best shape of my life when I turn 40... now I just want to be able to get out of this boot.

We also went and played laser tag and took a tour of the rehab hospital(Coral Desert Rehabilitation- located in beautiful St George, Utah!!!!)that I work at and own a piece of. I think I convinced my Aunt to get going on getting that knee replacement. She has trouble getting around and will be improved functionally with the surgery. I told her "you'll hate it for three weeks and then think it's the best thing you ever had done". Laser tag was fun. I'm a big target and I also got to hang with Tatum. It was her first time and we had fun... fun while we got slaughtered. I hobbled around and my foot was sore afterwards, but Bandit and Firefox did our best. (Our Laser tag names). Hopefully photo bucket is done downloading and I can get that slideshow on here....

My main regret from everyone's visit here was not getting to say goodbye to some of the visitors. Sorry Laura- we'll catch up on facebook I guess....

Celebration of Life

2009-02-16T21:41:00.000-08:00

Wow... that was cool. It has been a three day extravaganza of relatives and friends, I now know why they say blood is thicker than water. We had Pops "Celebration of Life" party on Saturday and had roughly 60 people there. That is great, considering if we had it in Houston or Mizzou the number would have been a lot more. Pops did great for the whole deal and was better than I had seen him in the last few weeks. The key was we gave him "Provigil" as a pep pill and it did wonders. His attitude and recall were great in relation to the past month- I also know he has been on cloud nine with both his brothers and all sorts of relatives in town. My main concern at this point is the crash that will follow when all relatives are gone. He already broke down after his brothers left. He cried and cried and said that it was "the end of the brotherhood" about five minutes after Eric left. It took a minute for it to sink in but he grasped the finality of if after Eric drove away. I can only imagine. I love my brothers and would be distraught if I knew that was it- the last goodbye. His only saving grace was that more kin showed up after Eric left. Eric told him to "look up my boy when you get there" as he lost a valued son years ago. I think it took Pops a few minutes to realize the magnitude of the comment when put out there. But I say this, family is solid, and I'd die for my siblings if I had the choice.

The service was great. It was 2 hours long and I finally had to cut it off because it was just that... 2 hours long. We had a good walk down memory lane and I learned some stories about my Dad. He is a beautiful man and I learned that he had a mischievous upbringing as a boy. Nice. A bit of validation for my own dirty deeds growing up.
Honestly, it could not of gone any better. I have this to say.... I have great relatives. The folks at the celebration told tear jerking as well as humorous stories to no avail. Follow that up, stories of military prowness and goofy exploits. I now know what they mean by FAMILY. Roger, Heather, Mike, Laura, Lana, Lynette, and my siblings and aunts and uncles.... THANK YOU FOR A GREAT TIME AND A WONDERFUL RECONNECTION. My wife, KA(it's not Kay but short for KerryAnn)expressed how lucky I was to have great relatives that were so friendly. It's family baby!!!!! Church relations also brought in stories from past and present. Although my parents and I believe different doctrine of religion it was still a great deal to hear about God's word and how my father had lived his life spreading Jesus Christ to those who were in need.

I must admit I am half exhausted by the whole ordeal- especially since I learned that I was "the organizer". I was asked numerous times where people were supposed to be and how things were gonna happen. I had no idea I had so much power, or else I would of set up a Humphrey "dance off" or a group Twister game. I have a ton of pics and will load them soon. I also want to load the 15 minute Lone Star video of his life. If anyone knows how, let me know. C ya......... Matt

Visit Time

2009-02-13T10:53:00.001-08:00

Family and friends are filing in for the big celebration day tomorrow. If you happen to read this please limit all visits today to about 10 minutes or less. Pops is like a checking account- there are only so many withdrawls that can be made from him before his is out- or bankrupt so to speak. Looking forward to a good, yet hectic, day today and tomorrow. Have already seen Uncle Eric (Pops bro) and his wife, Jan, and my bro Mark and his wife, Sylvia, stayed with us last night. Going to get Adele in about an hour with her girls.
Pops had a bad night last night so we are hoping the "yo-yo" philosophy with him will be in effect and he will have a good day tomorrow. Ethan, the hospice nurse, has given him Provigil to take tomorrow as a "pep pill". That way he can be on a good note for the most part for the big party. Let's hope it works and all goes well.

Saturday Itinerary

2009-02-09T15:49:00.000-08:00

I'm sitting here at EE's talking about the Celebration party. Noah is at soccer practice and we are waiting for him before we go to the gym. Mom has gotten calls asking what to wear to the party. The answer is that it is not formal, be comfortable. Pops is wearing the sweater vest and black pants, EE something with a black coat. Both of my boys are wearing their suits. KA has a new dress. Tatum will look cute. I haven't thought about it- maybe a dickie or an ascot, but definitley suspenders.

Party agenda is as follows: starts right at 11 at the church we attend- FSBC Hurricane. It will probably go roughly an hour and a half and then a luncheon will be served afterwards. The only other agenda is at night there will be a BBQ in Virgin, Utah at Cindy McFaddens home. This is KA's mom- or the "ol' mother in law". Pops is hoping to attend these two things. Other than that enjoy southern Utah ammenities- only problem is that it is a high in the low 50's and a good chance of rain.

Again, any other questions contact me at the numbers, email listed previously.

Directions to Celebration of Life Party

2009-02-05T07:50:00.000-08:00

Have been getting calls and EE is also talking to folks wondering exactly where to go for the big party. We keep hearing from other people who are going to attend. It is exciting for my parents to have the friend and relative list grow. Both of my parents will have all siblings there and other friends will be attending that have RSVP'd . The party starts at 11 AM at First So. Baptist Church.

So here are directions: To First Southern Baptist Church in Hurricane Utah aka: Party Central.

From Las Vegas get onto I-15 North. If from McCarran Intl. Airport follow the signs to I-15 and head towards Utah. Stay on I-15 for about 120 miles. You will pass through the Virgin River gorge and then a strip of Arizona before you hit the Utah border. Go through St George and once you hit exit 16/ Hurricane go to the right (only way you can go). That part is roughly 120 miles but the speed limit is 75 most of the way. It is then about 15 miles into Hurricane to the church. As you see the town and head down the hill into it, it is on the right hand side. 1565 W State. If you get lost, call me and I can navigate you. Count on about 2 hours to get there from the airport. Call 435 229 4259. It's really easy to find. One thing to keep in mind is that we are in the mountain time zone and Las Vegas is in the Pacific time zone- with this you lose an hour coming from Vegas. For instance, if you leave Las Vegas at 8AM you will get here roughly at 11 AM Utah time. If coming from the north on I-15 again look for exit 16. It's getting close- looking forward to it. Matt

Life Is Funny

2009-02-03T09:53:00.000-08:00

Had a good time last night hanging out with Lone Star and EE for a little while. Went to Golds Gym after basketball practice with Noah and when I got done I stopped by the folks. It was about 8 o'clock and when I went in we got to watch Wheel of Fortune. Have never really watched it, but they were into it. Better than Lawrence Welk which was on the other day. That is just a bad show- or good to make fun of. Snappy dressers anyway. Funny thing is how the whole mentality can change from day to day- or even hour to hour with them. They were happy and joking and it was a good atmosphere. Earlier in the day it was apparently "a rough day"

Continue to hear from more people about the party. That is good. We will represent here in Utah as accommodating hosts. Glad to have any old friends for the celebration and continue to send cards, notes, etc...

Little Kid

2009-01-31T09:40:00.000-08:00

Pops has now been "moved over" for a few days now. I call this blog Little Kid because he still spends more time at the old place, the Cottage. This is fine except for he is like a little kid and says stuff like "can I take a nap in your bed?" Just like a little one always trying to gravy their way into your bed. I do think it is good for him to get over to the Cottage but he needs to take advantage of the main service involved with being at the assisted living. Use the call button. Use the nursing aides. He has been having accidents during the day and even more at night because he tries to get up on his own. The whole purpose in having them pay more for the other room is for safety and ease with tasks. I am going to have a talk with him today and emphasize this. A persuasive scolding or something like that.

We have had good response to the Celebration of Life Party. Family on both sides are coming and also some old friends. Lee and Eric and family are coming from Massachucets and my Aunt Maxine and all three of her kids, my cousins, are coming as well. They were saying it might be the last time to see all of their cousins at the same time. It got me thinking: the last time I was together with all four of my siblings at the same time was 1988. That's pretty lame, but we have never been a get together family. I have vowed to do it different with my kids and that also was one of the things that I wish we did more of growing up and into adulthood. Oh well. Hope all are well and as put on previously,if you have any pics, stories, quips about Lone Star get em to me before the 14th. 1404 N Rome Way, Apple Valley, UT 84737 or 435 229 4259. I'm outta here. KA took Tatum and went down with her girlfriend Wendy, and her little one, Scout to Las Vegas for a "girls day". So boys are going to see Paul Blart...Mall Cop. O-yeah!

Noah's Basketball

2009-01-31T09:35:00.000-08:00

We won 43-12 today. The team we played was terrible and I kept our good dribblers out more than usual so not to run it up. Really, I did. noah played well and had 4 points and a nice little shake and bake step back baseline jumper. NYCE!!! It is fun to coach these kids and watch them grow as players. We have one more game next week. It will be Pizza Day after the game. Win or lose, it's all OK with pizza.

Record 5-1.

Movin In

2009-01-27T17:15:00.000-08:00

Pops moved in to the assisted living last night. We got him officially set up by 9 PM. We had to go to Wal Mart and get a longer cable cord... you absolutely cannot "officially" move in without a boob tube. KA was great and was there from about 6 to 8:45 helping move stuff from drawers and getting things organized. My buddy Chuck and I moved the TV and entertainment center from storage and got it all hooked up. Also, thanks to my buddy Brandon who was on call and ready if I had to go up to my house and get my truck. It was easier to use Chuck's truck since I was already in town.

He slept over there last night and did OK. There will be glitches with the transition, that is definite, and it will be hard for both of them. We'll get it all worked out and the nice thing is they are literally 20 yards from each other if both in bed and also they both can move enough to see each other. Today Lone Star spent hours at the old pad- even took a nap there. But we now have it set up so the help is available at night. I actually think it will be harder on EE at this point because she is the one losing socialization- even if the socialization snores and needs help to go to the bathroom 5 times a night. Reminds me of "tried and true". The joke with the 2 old people where the old guy says "tried and true" to which she responds "i'm tired of you too!!!"

Went over with the kids and did a half lymphedema and half rhetrograde massage to Pops feet tonight. Zane and Noah helped with a noise and socialization in the Cottage with Grandma and did the usual: fill the bird feeder, move this, etc.. Tatum and I worked on Pops feet. I massaged and Tatum and Pops watched cartoons. Sweet.

Update on Lone Star

2009-01-25T14:02:00.000-08:00

Have been going to see Pops everyday for the last three days...and am planning on "stopping by" almost every day. He has not looked good the last week and is getting weaker. The hope is still that he will be able to enjoy his upcoming party, and also that he will still be here for it. I started doing a lymphatic massage on his feet and and ankles because they looked so terrible. A hospice gal comes by 3 days a week to do a leg massage but when I came by Friday a couple hours after her you could not even tell it had been done. At least use the lotion. So I put on gloves and worked the swelling out partially and also ranged his ankles and toes. He stated that he could actually walk after it was done. This was nice because he has only been transferring from chair to wheelchair and using the wheelchair full time. I know it's a tempoary fix and the benefits are short lived. A few hours later they will swell again and there is no where for the edema to go, but I figure he gets relief from it and also it's 30 minutes that I get to talk with them. He perks up and it gives Mom a little break. Also, it is good to see him because I do not feel he will be here much longer. KA has been great to go by dutifully, where I call and see my Mom when she comes by my work, but with Pops not getting out I am making a concerted effort to see him and spend time helping with needs. It is the reason they moved here from Missouri when he got ill.

We ordered him a lift chair because he has been having difficulty getting over to the wheelchair. He fell last night and hurt his hip and cut his leg. The nursing assistant from next door came over and helped him get back in the chair but he says his hip is sore. That's all we need is a fracture. He has also been assessed for moving over to assisted living. It could happen any day because he needs help with all tasks and is wearing EE out by all night long requests/ needs. As stated before, she is limited physically and does her best but is getting worn down. The lift chair will help whether he is at the cottage or over at assisted living.

Another Win For Noah

2009-01-25T13:50:00.000-08:00

We won our basketball game Saturday 29 to 12. Noah had a good game and scored a basket and went 1 for 2 from the line. We actually played sloppy at times but the team we played wasn't very good so there was no sense of urgency.

Record 3-1

Changes

2009-01-23T10:10:00.000-08:00

Pops has had more bad days as of late. In fact, the "good days" are more like a couple of good hours. It has gotten harder on EE/ Mom and she has looked tired the last times i've seen her. I did have a good visit with them yesterday and spent some time talking and hanging out with them. Pops and I had a "Patch Adams" moment (movie with Robin Williams)when he said to me "you know i'm dying...i'm on my last leg". To which I responded "getting ready for the dirt nap." He replied "the last mile" and I followed with "assuming room temperature." He then laughed because he had not heard that one.

We talked about buying a recliner lift chair because of his declining mobility. He was against it and does not want to spend the money. Yet it is getting to that time because of Moms lack of physical skills to help him get around. Also, I talked him into it when I explained that the lift chair costs less than one month at the assisted living. There deal right now is they are living in an apartment that costs a certain amount of money. If he moves into assisted living they still pay the same there, but pay extra for Pops assisted living care. We might end up getting him a lift chair and also have him move next door to the assisted living- unless he rebounds quickly. I'm going to go by and talk to him again today. He always seems to perk up when visitors are around.

Make Up Your Mind Dude

2009-01-19T14:24:00.000-08:00

Got off the phone with KA a little earlier. I was feeling pretty good because I just finished painting the kitchen and living room- a solid 3 day process. I'm a heck of a cutter, or so KA tells me to keep me painting. She helped some as well...this time.
Anyways, KA talked with Ethan, the hospice nurse and case manager for Pops. He called KA to say that the way Pops was declining he was hoping he would be here for his Celebration of Life Party. He has labored breathing with little activity and Pops says he just feels "drained". Ethan deals with end of life on a daily basis with patients so I go with his judgement on death timelines far more than my own. It was just that a week ago Ethan said he could be here awhile. Now he said he is presenting with end of life symptamatology. He did also say, that he could "rally" again. I know that no one except God knows what he has in store for Pops timeline here on this planet- but the point being is that if anyone really wants to see Lone Star or talk to him give him a call or set up a time to stop by. He could be here for months or who knows.

A Change In Meds

2009-01-19T08:10:00.000-08:00

Today is the day that Pops is switching to Methadone and ramping off the patches. He has been having some shaking and tremors- sometimes pretty severe. Went by and saw them over the weekend and his spirits were pretty good while we were there. I emphasized to him the need to get out of the house. As stated previously, since he went on hospice he has become a hermit. He's not letting his toe nails grow and saving his urine in jars or anything, but he never gets out- so he sits there and dwells on his condition. There is a psychological component to how he feels and to his well being and you should enjoy life, whether it's for two months or eight months or whatever.

Talked with him and EE about the agenda for the Celebration of Life party. Were mapping out some details because it will be coming up fast. I have heard from a few people about RSVP, but not too many. EE is calling some folks as well. People aren't used to something like this party and you have to know to make arrangements.

NOAHS BASKETBALL:
We lost 31-19 on Saturday. The team we played was good. They had won 59-17 and 41-6 to other teams so it was the battle of the unbeatens. They were in my kids heads before we even started. One kid on our team said we were gonna lose before it even started. If I had known I would of sat em down. We got down 18-2 and looked lost. Then they decided to play and we outscored them 17-13 the rest of the way. We practice today and I am gonna work em hard....mean coach.

List of Hotels for Celebration of Life Party

2009-01-15T09:21:00.000-08:00

I have been asked to put a list of hotels in the area for people who will be attending Lone Stars Celebration party.

Closest to Mom and Pops: Holiday Inn Express. Washington, Utah
435 986 1313. It's new and less than a mile from their place. About 10 miles from the actual town of Hurricane where the party will go down.

In Hurricane: Travelodge 435 635 4647. It's Travelodge- ya get what ya get. There is also a Motel 6: 435 635 4010 and a Super 8 435 635 0808.

On Highway 9- about a mile from the party and town and 8 miles from Mom and Pops: Comfort Inn 435 635 3500, Days Inn 435 635 0500.

There are also accommodations in St George or up near Zion National Park if you are looking for something different or advanced. It is 18 miles from Hurricane both ways roughly.

You can also get online and check stuff out and see ratings and such. Good luck in your search and any questions, call me at 435 229 4259.

Adele with the "Folks"

2009-01-13T11:47:00.000-08:00

Couple of good photos of Mom and Pops with Adele. She sent me these and they all look happy.

Pull My Finger

2009-01-13T11:44:00.000-08:00

Adele gave me this photo. I just pulled the old "Hey Mom...pull my finger" routine on her. Honestly, it is good to see her laughing in this shot.

Party Time!!!

2009-01-12T19:55:00.001-08:00

Laser Mania was great. The boys had fun.

Noah's Basketball

2009-01-12T19:47:00.000-08:00

I coach Noah in basketball and we are now 3-0. We took down our opponent 28-10 and we actually did not play well. Good D, crappy/ sloppy O. We play another 3-0 team next week that is supposed to "be the best". We'll see. The nice thing for me is that this is so much more low key than football. I literally stay up at night and think about football games before and after. Not with basketball. The kids physical skills are so limited that only 50% of the kids can really play. Noah had 1 point. He shot twice, got fouled once and went 1 for 2 from the line.

Birthdays for Everybody!!!

2009-01-11T06:59:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was birthday day. EE had a birthday and we also had a birthday party for both Zane and Noah. Zane's b-day was the day after Christmas and Noah's was January 7th. Our kids each took 3 friends and we went to Laser Mania. I had never done it and it was quite fun. I think the kids really enjoy killing the big old guy who A) doesn't understand the rules and strategy and B) is twice the size of anyone else in there. Hard to sneak around behind the walls when they are only 4 to 5 feet tall in places. Figured it out by the second game and then I became a "weapon". Both the boys were really happy when I asked them about it afterwards. KA was great in organizing the whole deal.

Adele came in yesterday to spend a couple of days with our parents. EE picked her up and we went to Mongolian BBQ for lunch. I believe it was pedicure time for the girls after that. We had to run off and do our kid party. Pops did not come out to lunch. He didn't feel well and has limited desire as well. He left the house on Christmas and felt ill, went out for their anniversary for an hour and felt bad and hasn't been out since. He is now a hermit. He does go across the way for meals consistently but is just weak, fatigued and nauseous most of the time. Main concern is that he feels OK for his Celebration of Life party. We are going to do everything to accommodate his health needs that day. I also need to figure out a way to have people RSVP for it. Nothing set in stone, but at least a general head count.

I will post birthday pics and figure out an RSVP deal to put on the blog as well.

Noahs Birthday Dinner

2009-01-07T19:16:00.000-08:00

Today is Noahs 10th B Day so we went to Benjas and had Thai food and sushi. All the kids love sushi- which is great. He and Zane are having a laser tag party an Saturday after the basketball game. Mom/ EE came with us to dinner and as usual, Pops wasn't up to it.

Happy New Year

2009-01-07T07:49:00.000-08:00

We had friends Lyle and Wendy over for New Years, and we actually stayed up to midnight. It's amazing how much entertainment you can have when Lyle brings his Andy Griffith trivia game. Toast all to a great new year..

Zane with his B Day

2009-01-07T07:47:00.000-08:00

Big 13. NYCE!!!!!

Basketball Team With Solid "D"

2009-01-03T11:50:00.000-08:00

Noah had his second basketball game today. We won 36 to 14. I am gonna be on em for Mondays practice. We only gave up 10 in the first game and we need to lock down the 2-1-2 half court press. (That is a joke) Also, I had to work today so another dad coached. I mapped it all out on who plays when and where and it went well. We are now 2-0.

There will be more pics on soon. I couldn't get it to work at my house and the e mail would not go through to rout them to work either. Oh well.

Teenager In The House

2009-01-02T14:17:00.001-08:00

Zane had his 13th B Day after Christmas. He is getting more mature all the time and is becoming a real asset as a son. Still waiting for that full teenage attitude...Good news, he still likes us at this point.

Archive Picture sent To Me

2008-12-31T10:18:00.000-08:00

This picture was sent to me from Lone Star and EE's neighbor, Linda, when they lived in Coeur D' Alene Idaho. Pops is one sweet Santa.

Happy Anniversary

2008-12-31T09:58:00.000-08:00

Today is Mom and Pops 52nd wedding anniversary. We are taking them out to lunch to the place that everyone who read this knows already..."They have great variety here." Wishing all a Happy New Year and may all your wildest dreams come true...Matt

Hospice Time

2008-12-27T11:23:00.000-08:00

Started Lone Star on hospice yesterday. Holiday is over and family is gone so it was decided to get him on it since he has been miserable the last 3 days. Only real change with meds is hiogh doses of ibuprofen 3 times daily and using roxynol (liquid morphine) for breakthrough pain instead of percocet. He had a good night last night, per report from EE, so we'll see.

Any Lone Star Photos or Stories?

2008-12-25T18:18:00.001-08:00

If you have any stories about John that you can share or any photos that might shed some light on him please get them to me or let me know.

Merry Christmas!!!

2008-12-25T18:04:00.000-08:00

Had a good day at Cindy's for Christmas. Opened grandparent gifts and had a great meal of prime rib and assortments. Lone Star felt like crap all day and all last night. He stayed in the bedroom laying down most of the time and was a trooper even for coming. He is having bouts of nausea frequently now and it is not stomach flu. Most likely the big C working it's wonders elsewhere. We did open gifts and do a circle prayer while he was supine in Cindy's bed. She is so good for letting him camp out in her room and letting Humphrey's bombard her home. Pops and EE made an audio history of their life with Cathy A as a Christmas gift and that was presented. I have only heard parts but I know it will only increase in meaning as time goes on.

2008-12-25T17:54:00.000-08:00

We have had a great time with P's family. We've gone sledding and played in the snow. The kids have done snow angels in their underwear (and that reminds me...I owe them all a dollar). We also had a great day today for Christmas at KA's Mom's house. Thanks Cindy.

Last Zometta Infusion

2008-12-25T17:23:00.001-08:00

Pops went in and saw Dr Te (oncologist)for the last time on Tuesday, the 23rd. We let him know his plan of hospice and he had his last Zometta infusion. It's a bone strengthener that he will not get on hospice. Figured we might as well get his bones as strong as possible in case of falls. Now or later. PSA was 111 when tested this week. It might go down briefly in the next month or two, but Dr Te did emphasize that if it did go down it would most likely be for a brief period. We'll see.

Getting in the Christmas Spirit

2008-12-22T15:57:00.000-08:00

Gabby being festive getting ready for company. She's always been a party girl.

Zane and Noah enjoying a snow day. First time in 9 years we have had school cancellations.

P and Stef and kids (Sara, Ashley and Luke) got in last night. So of course we went with Mom and Pops to where? You guessed it.. Chuck A Rama. It is good to have them here and the kids have so much fun together. We are going sledding tomorrow and getting ready for a great holiday season. Tonight we are going to Tuachan Amphetheater for a live nativity. It will be a good time with the kids. There will be upcoming pictures of Christmas events and of the holiday itself. I hope you all have a great holiday season and are safe and have many blessings.

Todd Visit

2008-12-22T15:48:00.000-08:00

Had a good visit and will see T again in February for the Celebration of Life Party. Always good to see family as we rarely get together as a group.

T in for a visit

2008-12-19T12:21:00.000-08:00

My brother Todd came in yesterday for a day long visit. It was nice to see him and talk about old times. Of more importance, was he spent hours with Pops and EE talking and I know it made them both happy. What a dutiful son. Went to, of all places, Chuck a Rama, and had lunch and then T and me and my kids went to Madagasgar 2. It was funny- i guess I now need to see # 1. The kids were out of school for a snow day. It's the most snow since we have lived here. There is about a foot at our house. Good news about it is P, Paul, is coming in Monday for X mas with his family so we will head north and do some sledding. Lots of good places here for that.

Pops has a bug or something. he has been throwing up and is so weak he needs someone standing by to walk. I hope it is a 24 hour bug only.

EE went in today to have her bladder stimulator implanted. It is a trial thing to see if it can help her control things. We will follow it and hope it improves her independence. Keep on rockin' in the free world....Matt

Celebration of Life Party Date Set

2008-12-15T10:20:00.000-08:00

We are going to have Pops "Celebration of Life" get together on February 14th/ Valentines Day. To get in more detail, Pops does not want a formal funeral. Instead, he wants to have a Celebration of Life party that he can attend. So we will work on complying with this as a family. We wanted to do it fairly soon since he is declining at a rapid rate. With that being said, he could still be around for who knows how long. That's between him and the big guy. He is going to start on hospice at the first of the year. I am going to call some people and let them know about this "life party" but anyone who reads this please pass it along. It will take place in Hurricane, Utah. The closest large airport is Las Vegas, NV, but there are connection flights to St George, UT that can be made. Hurricane is roughly 2 hours from Vegas and 15 minutes from St George.

The itinerary roughly will be to have a slide show presentation and tell stories and remembrances of Lone Star that people have. It will be sometime around noon on Saturday the 14th. If anyone was thinking they would attend a funeral for Pops then this would be what you would want to look into instead. As stated previously, this is what he wants and he will not be having a funeral that can be attended once he is gone. If you know you cannot come and have a good story of Lone Star please get it to me ahead of time. Either email it to me @ matt@coraldesert.com or send it to me via mail to Matt Humphrey 1404 N Rome Way Apple Valley, UT 84737

If you can attend, please let me know. If you have questions, call me. (435) 229-4259.

Noahs First Basketball Game

2008-12-15T10:16:00.000-08:00

We had our first game Saturday. I coach Noah in the 3rd/ 4th grade city league. We won 24 to 10 against a team I kinda felt sorry for. They had no one that could dribble or shoot well so we packed in a 2-3 zone one possession and then a 2-1-2 half court press the next. We have only had 2 practices so it was pretty rough- but we have some decent kids...and some weak ones. Noah played like a beast. 2 for 3 shooting for 4 points and some good rebounds and D.

Christmas Party at The BeeHive Home

2008-12-11T07:20:00.000-08:00

These are pics from the party. They include EE singing Christmas carols and kids and Pop telling Santa what they want this year. Tatum told Santa she wanted her "two front teeth" since she does not have them right now. Pops was asked to lead Silent Night at the end. Both of my parents do have good voices and it is nice to hear them sing.

Zion Photos

2008-12-11T07:17:00.001-08:00

We took Pops and EE to Zion National Park two Sundays ago. Pop froze the whole time. I kept telling him to switch roles with me. I'll get in the chair and he can push me. We did the Temple of Sinewava trail.

Gearing Up For The Holidays

2008-12-10T09:41:00.001-08:00

I am going to download pictures tonight of the big Christmas party that we had last night at the BeeHive Home. A rockin event was had by all and still in bed by 8:30. Life continues with Noah starting basketball this week- practices anyway. I am coaching him and we will see how they shape up. It is a lot easier than coaching football and much less stressful. I do enjoy it though.

Updates: EE went with KA to the Instacare 2 nights ago. UTI. She has already started to bounce back and is mobile again as of yesterday.

We are having Hospice Alliance come on Friday to do their song and dance about their program. The lady from Zions Way was a little off and did not impress- at least did not impress me. I have a friend who I thought worked for Zions Way but instead he works for Home Alliance and we will most likely go this way.Plan is still to wait till the first of the year as all his meds and junk are paid for via Medicare at this time.

We are planning a CELEBRATION OF LIFE PARTY for lone Star in February. I will talk about it more but I am trying to get a Saturday date in February for any friends/ family to come out and wish John well in his last part of his journey. He has stated he does not want a funeral and wants to be cremated. He would rather have folks come out to this party and enjoy them while he can. Once a date is set we will post it. This will be quickly as I know if people need to get tickets the sooner the better.

I'll get pics on tonight and hope all are having a joyous season so far as we start into Christmas. Let's remember the real reason of Christmas and think of others in need- especially those hit with recession and job losses.....Matt

Hospice Options

2008-12-05T08:18:00.000-08:00

Another Birthday Pic from Lone Star. EE and grandkids surrounding him.

Saw Dr Jones with Pops this week. It was nice because the parents had a family friend from Independence visiting them, Nancy. we talked about updates on PSA and overall medical plan. Main emphasis was hospice options and at this point we are going to go with Zion's Way. KA and I both know nurses who work for them and have asked around and it seems like a good fit. Plan will still be most likely to do it at the first of the year but it depends on many factors- biggest is how Pop feels. we are meeting with them today at 2 PM. No other real news except we are going to hold tight in our home. With the economy how it is we just fear that we won't be able to sell our house for a productive sum and will be stuck holding the bag with two mortages. Will update shortly..

Birthday party at Chuck A Rama

2008-11-30T10:19:00.000-08:00

Here is Pops as they were singing Happy B Day to him with the root beer float that they bring. 76...

Thanksgiving Photos at Cindy's

2008-11-30T10:15:00.001-08:00

Family at the table. Lone Star heading up the meal at the seat of honor. The other one is Pops with a card that Kelly made for him. It says something to the effect that she is glad he is here..." Happy Birthday. I'm glad your alive today."

Zanes Buck

2008-11-30T10:13:00.001-08:00

21.5 inch inside spread. Nice job for the masked hunter.

A Holiday and B-Day Celebration

2008-11-29T10:32:00.000-08:00

Lots of stuff to write on in the last couple of days. First off, there will be photos upcoming. Last night was a battle on the computer with KA, Tatum, Zane and me all wanting to use it. I was tired and by the time it was available I was in slug mode and did not download the pics so that I could put them on here. I will do it tonight (most likely).

We had a good Thanksgiving with our family and the Phelans going to Cindy's (KA's Mom) for the day. It was a cold, drizzly day- which actually was nice for the area and also made it feel more like the fall season. There was snow in the surrounding mountains which also is nice. The mountains should now be snow capped till about March. Pops and EE came with Adele and we had a great meal. The highlight was when we did a prayer where all were in a circle and we held hands. Everyone got to give thanks for what was on their mind and it went well. It got emotional with the underlying thought that this will most likely be Pops last Thanksgiving. He got tired and went and slept for an hour before we did dessert. All in all a good day- especially when we went home and watched Texas put a beatdown on A & M. Go Longhorns. The reality of pondering thoughts on Thanksgiving of what is important: faith, family, friends..makes the game of minimal importance, but still fun to root for.

Yesterday was Pops 76th birthday!!!! So of course we went and partied at Chuck A Rama, which was what both Mom and Pops wanted. He was feeling pretty good today which also was nice since the Phelan clan was leaving today and after all, it was his birthday. We gave him another half of Dexamethasone which Dr Te had decided to decrease without KA's or my knowledge. He was wiped out the day before at Thanksgiving and I can guarantee there was some relation to the Dexamethasone decrease. Dr Te did increase his pain patch to 75 mg but he had no energy. Anytime we change meds it is a balancing act to see what works.

We are again planning on taking Lone Star and EE to Zion National Park tomorrow. I have to work and KA is going to church. Afterwards we will load up 2 wheelchairs and our precious cargo and hit the park. We tried once before but Pops wasn't up for it the day of. Tomorrow we will try again and yes, try and get pics as well.

Have a great day...

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone

2008-11-26T09:37:00.000-08:00

Returned last night from Texas and have to update the medical scene on Lone Star JR. He saw Dr Te, the oncologist, on Tuesday. Still does not have comparable results from Missouri on the old bone scan- but this one taken here of course shows spots on pelvis, femur, ribs, scapulas, etc... We just need the other on to show changes. PSA this week is 66. It is climbing rapidly. Dr Te talked about options with Pops and EE-ranging from doing nothing at all too radiation and/ or chemo. Granted these are not for life sustaining measures but for pain management. I need to look into pros and cons for them so we can decide. At this point they do not want to do anything and let it ride. Pops has final say in all decisions, but I want them to be informed decisions. Pops also is having urination voiding problems again. He is going to have a test today to see what is going on. We know what it is, but what we can do is the concern.

Adele, Rick, and kids are here for Thanksgiving. They are helping with Mom and Pops and we are enjoying having them here. Tomorrow we will go to Cindy's, KA's Mom, and have Thanksgiving. Our family, Adele's family, Mom and Pops and Cindy will eat too much and watch football and such. I think I like Thanksgiving better than any other holiday. People get together and have a nice meal and you don't have all the expectations and commercialization of Christmas. I know the point behind Christmas is bigger- I get that. Just get tired of the whole build up.

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone. Will show hunting pics and Pops B Day shortly. He has a B Day on the 28th.

An Early Thanksgiving Celebration

2008-11-18T08:17:00.000-08:00

KA and I have been invited to the BeeHive home Thanksgiving dinner being held today around noon. We will go kick it with Lone Star and EE as well as with their other cohorts at the home. It will be nice and I know my Mom is excited that we will be attending. It will be nice because I am going out of town tomorrow with Zane for a week. West Texas here we come!

Called Dr Te's office prior to writing this in regards to bone scan results. They have the results of this bone scan but are waiting on a copy of the original bone scan that was done in Missouri. "Hopefully in the next couple of days." was what I was told. It will be nice to see changes and explore options from there.

Our plan for taking Lone Star and EE to Zion on Sunday got derailed. Pop wasn't up to it, so hopefully we can do it soon.

Communicated with cousin Laura and got updates on her family. Keep Lee in your thoughts and prayers because he is looking at prostate management options for a slowly rising PSA that he has been monitoring for years.

Hope all have a great day and Thanksgiving season. C ya...I'm "goin huntin!" Matt

Bone Scan

2008-11-15T13:50:00.000-08:00

Pops had a full body bone scan on Friday. It was a long day for him overall. We will wait for the results to see what action is taken. There is a remote possibilty of more radiation. This is not to cure the cancer but for pain management. His spirits have been relatively high. Will keep you updated of events.

I'm in a bit of pain right now. Hurricane Tiger 4th grade played in the championship a couple hours ago and went down 20-12. They beat us up front and had better blockers than we did in the interior. We beat em in the regular season but that doesn't matter now. Like I told the kids.."Remember how this feels...second place sucks." They did have a great year and myself and coaches conveyed to them how proud we were of them and to keep their heads up. They were a bit scared today. Two kids could hardly play because they were so emotional.

Final record 9-1. 2nd place. (Did I mention second place sucks???)

Plugging Along

2008-11-10T07:31:00.000-08:00

Mom and Pops actually went to church yesterday. That makes EE happy to get out and socialize- even though it wears out Pops. He had a pretty good day yesterday overall. Talked with them on the phone and they are waiting for breakfast as I write. They are going to come to Coral Desert if he feels up to it in a couple of hours. Plan is also to go to Zion NP with them next Sunday- weather permitting. We were gonna do it yesterday but the high was in the 50's.
Good weekend overall. It was cold and rainy yesterday with some hail but it made for a good Sunday afternoon hanging out watching football. It is fun now that the boys get into it a little bit. KA and the boys stayed home from church because Tatum didn't feel well (barf) and I had to go to work. By the time I got home Noah had all the channels and scores of the games we watch on the NFL ticket. We have an array of teams at our house. Me: Texans. KA: Bills. Zane: Patriots (bandwagon fan). Noah: Dolphins and Tatum: Not a care in the world related to NFL.
Saturday the weather was great and we had our first playoff game.
Tiger 4th Grade football beat Snow Canyon 25-12 in a game that was not that close. We got sloppy the last 2 minutes and let them score. It gives us stuff to work on this week. Upcoming Saturday will be for the championship. I'm ready to play it today.

Tiger 9-0. Or as I say it. 1-0. First team to 2 wins is the champ. CRATACA!!!!
Crazy Radical Attack Tigers Are Coming Again.

PSA Update

2008-11-05T05:33:00.000-08:00

Pops had his PSA taken last week prior to his Zometta infusion. It read 20.4. This was large increase and so it was retaken on Monday to make sure the reading was accurate. Results were now it is over 32.Just passing this info along. Will write more as it is known.

Halloween Cowgirl

2008-11-03T08:16:00.001-08:00

This is Tatum at Lone Star and EE's place Halloween night.

The Rollercoaster Continues

2008-11-02T11:28:00.000-08:00

I know my last blog was rather gloom and doom in terms of how Lone Star was doing. His PSA is still up and rising- which we have deemed as a group,(him included and as main decision maker) that it is not such a bad thing. Pops went to his latest infusion at DR Te's and that is where he found out about the rising PSA. While there, the PA told him "there is no reason why you at this stage should be in pain." She increased his pain patch and he has had pretty goood days since. He feels really good on day one of the pain patch. They change it every 3 days. He is still on a load of pain meds-- but he has felt functional the last few days. That is what makes life worth living. I am going to put pictures on later today once KA gets home and I can find the camera.

Pops and EE went to a Halloween party at the main assisted living building at Beehive on Friday night. It was nice to see them there even though he was done 45 minutes in and went back to the Cottage. That is actually when we got there- but he and EE enjoyed it. We showed off Tatum who was dressed as a cowgirl with chaps, hat and all. The boys didn't dress up and were not into Halloween. They are 9 and 12 and thinking it is a little lame.

Took parents to Chuck a Rama on Friday for lunch. I had things fall through and offered it to them. You would of thought I asked them to go heaven with me and I was God. They loved it and had not been there in at least a month. They were so appreciative and it emphasized to me how I need to go the extra mile to accomodate their needs in these times of Pops decline. I talked with Pops and told him he needed to have a genuine Bucket List (we watched the movie together) so that we could give him quality at these times. He said how he loved lunch at Chuck A Rama. That's easy- we can do that. We are thinking another Zion trip as talked about earlier when Lee and Dianne were here. We can do that. Anything else we are up for. Any suggestions let us know.

Lone Star and EE came to Noahs 4th grade football game on Saturday. KA deserves major kudos for going by their house, getting them to the game, and getting them home. It makes the game hard on her because she has to help them with mobility but when I asked her about it she said "it was fine when you saw how much they enjoyed it- especially my Dad." Folks in the stands kept looking and asking if they could help but all in all in went well. See Football results below.

Tiger Football:

Hurricane 7th Grade:
Won their game 24-6. Took it to Pine View who last time they beat 31-0. It was good to see them win another game. They were so close in many games and the winning mentality goes a long way in close games. Zane was a beast and played pretty well. Their center left the game with a compound fracture of his right index finger so Zane played some center as well as guard. He is OK except for shotgun snaps. Granted, he has never done or practiced them all year. He is an awesome kid. Hes 5'6" and 122 pounds at the age of 12 with a size 12 shoe. He takes after his Dad.
Ending Record: 2-6.

Hurricane 4th Grade:
We beat Cedar City 41-14 on a game that we could of held them scoreless and scored more points. We came out flat and were only up 14-0 at halftime. I laid into the kids a little bit and they were on fire in the second half. I think they are tinking playoffs since we have already clinched the #1 seed. My point is that anyone can win a game at this level if they come out hard- but we can't be beat in our league if we block, tackle, and execute. Noah was awesome today. He had 2 carries for 48 yards. One for a 40 yard touchdown on a counter play. He also had a 22 yard reception for a touchdown. Also scored an extra point for a score. Funny thing is I told him before the game : 20 bucks for a pic, 20 for a TD, 5 for an extra point and 1 dollar for solo tackles. Dads point after the game. No solo tackles.......come on boy... Was a great game for the little guy. He made 45 dollars, and earned a few fist bumps... Matt

Football Picture

2008-10-29T13:24:00.000-07:00

Thought I would put a picture of the 4th grade football team on. Gotta love number 7 on the end with the locks. Go Noah. On a lighter note than the previous entry..

PSA On The Rise

2008-10-29T09:16:00.000-07:00

Pops went and had his blood work done two days ago in preparation for his infusion of Zometta (bone strengthener) at the infusion clinic. That took longer than expected and wiped him out for the day. Yesterday he went for the infusion and his blood work was read. His PSA was at 20.4. He has gone from (and these readings are not to the detail): 1.4 3 months ago to 1.8 2 months ago to 4.6 1 month ago and now 20.4. Bottom line: the cancer drugs are not working and the cancer is waking up. He tells me it feels like it is growing and he has had more pain in his abdominal and upper leg areas. The doctor said they will recheck his blood to see if it is a false reading and then they can talk about options.

Options that were told to my Mom, EE, were that there is a possibility of more radiation. Both parents negated the idea and said that is not even an option. Radiation helped facilitate the lymphedema and the inflammation of the obturator internus muscle that they think causes so much pain. We will never know how much radiation precipitated secondary effects as mentioned above because let's face it: anyone I ever talk to in the medical community says that bone cancer is very painful. I need to keep that in mind myself sometimes when he is miserable and my patience is thin.

Where this leads us is yet to be determined. Whether it is months, years, whatever is not in the control of those that Lone Star feels dictate his life at times. I do know he was not upset at the news. When I talked to him I said "Sorry about your blood work results." in which he responded "Why, I think it's good news." He is tired of low quality of life.

We will check out options for his continued well being and put it in the hands of the big guy...

New Post

2008-10-25T20:31:00.000-07:00

Have had a lotta stuff happen in the past week. Sorry I did not not blog sooner but have been busy with life.

Regarding our house: The folks we are trying to get it from backtracked on our offer because it will hurt their credit- with this we are now looking at other houses, and hoping they will agree as our economical situations continue to go in the crapper nationally. We like that house, but are mainly just looking for a good deal overall. Biggest problem is that we were hoping to be in to accommodate family comfortably at holiday time.

Mom and Pops have both had a 24 hour bug in the past week. Lots of Clorox and help because they need assistance any time they fall below the threshold of function. They have been extra grateful- especially since the MD appointment with Dr Jones. Pops got sick on Thursday and it wiped EE out. Next day EE had the crud and Pops was still not recovered, and also is not equipped at a caregiver role. Never has been and will not start now. Kudos to the guys at BeeHive because they went overboard to accommodate Pops when he was at his worst- and at no extra charge....

Dr Jones visit went as a medical visit as well as a counseling intervention. Pops talked about how he hates the fact that "4 other people" (myself, KA, Dr Jones, EE) dictate what he takes internally and what he does. Long story short, it was emphasized that he controls his own destiny if he wants it. He just gets limited and cannot make decisions when he is in pain. We need to continue to teach what med is for what. For instance, he was tired this morning and wanted a pain pill to "give him energy". Wrong pill boss. The whole visit with Dr Jones involved yelling and tears about a plan. MD visit emphasis is that the plan is in Lone Stars hands overall- but with the value he has at this time we will look at hospice at New Years time if that is what he wants at that time. He fluctuates with keeping a positive mentality- but with family encouragement can be led to appreciate his positive aspects that to him demonstrate life worth living.

After the UEA week:

7th Grade football:
Lost a hard fought game to Desert Hills 20-14. They should have won, but turnovers and an interception on the 9 yard line with one minute to go sealed the deal. Zane played great. He had a solo tackle on punt coverage and played a mean left guard. He gets better every week and wants to play next year. I told him 7th grade was when I started to blossom and am looking forward to growth from him.

Record: 1-6

4th Grade Football
We played the worst team in the league this week. It was nice because we played kids at all sorts of positions that they would normally not play. We won 43-0, and it could have been worse. Noah had 3 carries in the first half for 50 yards and then had a groin pull. He busted one for 37 and they caught him on the 3. He only played three plays in the second half with pain. It was a good game as a head coach. Kids got to play a ton that normally don't play that much.

Record:7-0

Peace

Another Tough Day

2008-10-21T12:47:00.000-07:00

Pops is going to see Dr Jones tomorrow. We need to see what we can do to get him some relief and an overall plan that relieves the stress of both Pops and EE's daily living. My Mom still has in her head that hospice will be this wonderful experience where pain will lessen, energy will return and all will be smooth. This isn't how it will be- it will be hard. I do agree some aspects will be better, or easier- but others will be trying and difficult. As I have told her, and him, sometimes changing in desperation to find relief is not always better. Hopefully we can get some answers tomorrow that will ease Pop's burdens at this time. Will write with results.

Went deer hunting with Zane over the weekend. I'll say this: the hunting here stinks compared to Cooper Mountain Ranch in Texas. No deer were harmed in our weekend adventure...

Like A Grape

2008-10-17T14:38:00.000-07:00

Pops has has some bad days the last few. He has been really swollen and has not felt well overall. Called Dr Jones and got his appointment moved up two weeks so that we can get in and see what we can do. He fell for the first time in weeks 2 nights ago, but it is mainly due to the fact that he is carrying extra water weight- not just in his legs, but all over. Main thing is trying to keep his spirits up. EE has been great with him- especially since she is the one he takes his frustrations out on when things do not go as planned. She has been patient and does her best with all caregiving needs that she can. They went by the rehab today (I wasn't there) and he got in the pool. This worked out well except for the fact that it exhausts him for hours afterwards.
He might not say or admit it, but he would really appreciate phone calls to check on him at this time...

Basic Update

2008-10-13T11:09:00.000-07:00

The last few days have been typical for Pops and EE. Pops will have a good day or two, followed with a time of breakthrough pain where he doesn't function well. We are writing down all "breakthroughs" on a sheet so that we can report them to the doctor. The good news is that EE is getting more adept at handling the pain exacerbations and when she has questions, she calls. For instance, Saturday morning was a breakthrough pain day and after taking extra Oxycontin some added Dexamethasone was needed. Pops felt good Sunday/ yesterday and no extra pain meds were needed. They did have a plan on trying to get out to church but after getting ready he was wiped out. That's kinda how it goes- it's day to day. As Dan Patrick used to say: "aren't we all day to day."

Tiger football update:

7th Grade Football:
Zane's team got beat 32-0 on Saturday. He gets discouraged about their talent level as a team but he has really improved. He held his own and I was very proud of him. Their coach is still very upbeat and supportive. I think he sees the talent level and has reasonable expectations. The two 7th grade city leagues teams are doing really well so there is talent at his grade level- just it is limited on his team. They only have 15 players.
Record 1-5

4th Grade Football Update:
We won 12-7 with a fourth quarter comeback. This was the team that beat us both in the regular season last year 24- 20 and also 7-6 in the playoffs. We played the worst half of football in the first half that we have played all year. We were flat and uninspired. I got after them at halftime and we outscored them 12-0 in the second half. Noah played great. He had a ton of tackles and rushed 3 times for 15 yards. He smashed his hand between two helmets on a carry and I could tell it hurt. It was bloody under the nail and skin was torn off. I asked him if he wanted to go out and he said "no". He was a little stud. They all were as it was cold. Game time temp was 44 degrees.
Record 6-0

Visit with Dr Jones

2008-10-09T08:12:00.000-07:00

Went and saw Dr Jones on Monday with Pops. Went over some basics of meds, pain, lymphedema, etc. News of note is that Pops PSA went from 1.8 to 4.0 in th last blood work. It raised "to a point of concern" to Dr Jones. At the end of the visit Dr Jones talked to him about "playing the game" to stay alive. He also said "it could be 3 to 5 years" of playing the game. Later on, Pops was bummed out and almost despondent. Lone Star's deal is this: If I can function and have a quality of life that represents fulfillment- great, If I can't have quality that allows fulfillment and I am just a shell of myself, then what's the point.

With this in mind Pops wants to look at hospice. I have a nurse that I have known for over 10 years who is a hospice coordinator. She came out and talked to them at their house on Tuesday. Granted, we are not jumping into anything. Pops and EE were all excited and ready to go on the hospice route that day. KA and I emphasized to them that changing meds and stopping Casodez and Lupron will most likely not make you feel better. In fact, you'll probably feel worse. There will be more medicine, almost guaranteed, as the cancer advances- just different medicines.

The plan is for myself to talk with both Dr Jones and Dr Te and get their thoughts on the whole hospice route. Our general plan has been to stay the course through the first of the year and then look at hospice options to help his wanted outcomes and also assist with care needs. Idea being we want him to have a good holiday season. Feeling being, if he does all these changes he will feel even worse with family coming in for the holidays. He doesn't seemed concerned with this- but I am.

Bottom line: it is his decision on what route we take and when we take it. Myself and KA are just trying to accumulate all the knowledge and aspects of care to make their decisions as easy as possible...

Beef Stew

2008-10-04T20:19:00.000-07:00

By Beef Stew I mean just a hodge podge of info. Changed the pics and now you do not get the front entrance. It's not palacial, but it was nice to see the "Humphrey House" sign.

Mom and Pops have been doing better the last few days. We went from all the medications aren't working to cover the pain to I feel o.k. in a 4 day period. Pops pain does fluctuate but I think it both physical and a bit psychological. If there are no visitors for a couple of days his pain seems worse. Lots of activity- pain is lessened. I think when he is alone or just the 2 of them he dwells on it. I say this with saying that KA goes by everyday during the week in the AM. I encourage them to come to my work- but even then I don't have a lot of time sometimes to do one on one with them. EE is pretty self sufficient at Coral Desert- Pops needs help. I encourage them to get out everday... there is a whole world still revolving out there. As Joe Dirt says...."Life's a garden....dig it."

They went to Chuck A Rama on their own on Friday after coming and utilizing the pool at Coral Desert and facilities. I wanted to go with them but had obligations with patients and land lease agreements. They did it and it wore them out--- but they did it. Congrats to a small step for independence.

Thank you to Chuck, Jeff, Bill, Bodie and Zane for helping move into a storage shed. We spent an evening transporting the rest of the townhome stuff to storage last week. These guys were all awesome in this endeavor. I won't say who was blowing the cheese during this...

Hope all is improving in the Gulf Coast region. time to time when things are going well I ponder how friends and loved ones are coping with the continued adjustments that are a part of life in a hurricane ravaged region. I still call people weeks later and their phones are disconnected. Makes you appreciate what ya got.

We see Dr Jones on Monday with some concerning issues. Pops has pain management issues that kill me. He'll complain and complain where it wears my mom out, and then go see the doctor and say "it's mainly fatigue, I don't really have any pain."
Were not doing this again. It's time to pay the piper and be straight with the doctor. Let's face it, Pops takes enough pain pills to drop a horse and we need to acknowledge the fact. If it is that bad.... What are the options?

Important stuff to me- not to all:

Hurricane Tiger Football 7th Grade:

Zane played pretty well- but his team got rolled 33-0 in a home game today. The other team had a one man show and I must admit he impressed me.
Record: 1-4

Hurricane Tiger Football 4th Grade:

We palyed the championship team from last year that went undefeated. We broke their 14 game winning streak and beat them 13-6 in overtime. Great game- we have way better skill players but our line still needs to improve on holding blocks. It was a great game and I am so proud of our guys for coming out on top. Noah had 1 carry for 2 yards on a sweep. I asked him after the game if he wanted more carries and he said "I don't care- as long as we win.." He's awesome to coach and an awesome little guy- as all 3 kids are.
Record 5-0

KA ran the St George Marathon today. I am beaming with excitement for her and also envious because I could not do it this year. It took her 5:24 but she did it. She says "never again" and we made her her dinner of choice which was steak, mashed potatoes and mustard carrots. She, and the football game, pumped me up to an awesome day today......

New Phone number for Humphrey's

2008-10-02T18:38:00.000-07:00

Pops and EE new phone number:
435 627- 2110

They are all moved out of the townhome and at the Cottages. Come give them a visit- they would enjoy it. Genius here skipped a pic when downloading- sorry you don't get to see the palacial office in the 800 sq ft home. EE won't like it because she wanted Outreach folks to see the plaques hung up on the wall.

People to have in your thoughts/ prayers:

Both my parents and their independence struggles.
Mike Purcell and her diagnosis of Liver CA.
Folks and friends in H-town/ Galveston and surrounding areas. Brother Mark was in Galveston with the National Guard and said it is gonna be a mess for at least a year.
KerryAnn running her first marathon this Saturday. "Run like the wind...." (Our joke)
Our country and all our idiot leaders on both sides. No matter how you slice it, both sides suck. Gotta love em anyway- they're Americans.
All the other calamities that I don't even know about....

Part of the Cottage

2008-10-02T18:32:00.000-07:00

I'm a "Bad Blogger"

2008-09-28T14:14:00.000-07:00

KA got up this morning and looked at the blog. She informed me that I was a "good blogger" and now I am a "bad blogger".- Because I do not update consistently. Truth is, there is no big day to day changes that are happening at this time. Lone Star and EE are at the Cottages and have not been coming to Coral Desert consistently. Pops is OK, but not up to leaving. He is actually very comfortable in the assissted living role. EE wants to do more- but doesn't want to leave Pops. This is a hard adjustment period for them. I need to take the camera and take pictures- problem is that I hate taking pictures, downloading them, and getting them on the blog. No matter how savvy I am at the blog process I still want it to be simple.

My buddies and I are moving the rest of the stuff from their townhome into "climate controlled" storage on Tuesday night. Should take a couple of hours. As a good blogger, I figured you should know- even if it's not high priority.

Mom and Pops phone should have their phone turned on this coming Thursday. Baja Broadband did not cover their area so after dinking around for two weeks we were back to square one. They will be hooked up this week with a new phone number and I will post it immediately. Because I am a good blogger.

Update on my boy's football:

7th grade Hurricane Tiger Football:
Zane played a ton at guard and defensive tackle- started both ways. They lost 18-2.The assistant coaches boy, who plays quarterback, can't throw the ball and had 4 interceptions. Three were very costly. All 4 were moon balls and needed a duck call to be blaring when they were coming down. He is a good athlete- he is just tiny, and more importantly, can't throw the ball. Kinda a vital asset to have if your going to throw at all. He would be a good WR or slot RB. Trouble is, they have a kid who could do a good job and throws pretty well from RB tosses.
Record:1-3

4th Grade Hurricane Tiger Football:
As the head coach I am very proud of these boys. They had there hardest test yet and won 12-0. We actually should of won 18-0 (or 19-0) but they had the touchdown line 5 yards farther back to start the game as we started down in the practice field grass because someone had scheduled a soccer game. We moved up to the turf in the second half and worked em. Their coaches whined and complained the whole game and felt self entitled. They were so negative and yelling at their kids that twice fans told the to coaches to shut up and make it for the kids. We were up 12-0 with 6 seconds to go and I threw a bomb (3 Motion 7 WR Fly). They were mad that I didn't kneel down. As we went through the hand shaking line I told them it was the kids B-day and so we threw it. In hindsight, I should of said that they were whiners and thats why we did it. I also got a call today from a "blocked caller ID" and they told me if we play again and I "pull that crap" that I should be afraid to go to the parking lot. Bring it..... Just bring it....
Record: 4-0
Football is so fun- even for the adults.But ya gotta remember the kids come first.